'I went from never running before to running half marathons in a year. This is all my advice.'

I have always hated running.

Despised it, even. Broke out in a rash at the thought of it. I honestly believed that my legs were simply not meant to move at speed, that my heart was not intended to beat fast, and that a "runner's high" was a fake concept invented to sell sneakers. I would never, ever, ever, be a runner.

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Until my second baby was born, that is, and I desperately needed an excuse to escape the house, even for 20 minutes. A few months later… I was kind of addicted. Twelve months later? I ran 21 kilometres. In a row.

If you're thinking that you're the type of person who could never do that, please let me assure you: if I can do it, so can you — but please take the opportunity to learn from my mistakes first.

Image: Supplied.

Invest in a good bra.

I know, I know. You didn't expect to see this tip at number one. Everyone's got to get a good sports bra eventually, but there's no need to do it as a first step, right?

Wrong. Trying to become a runner without a well-fitting, supportive bra is like learning how to drive a car with no suspension. It is technically possible to get going, but the ride is just too bumpy.

There are a lot of running bras out there, and what suits you best can be an annoying process of trial and error, but let me assure you that it is a worthwhile process of trial and error. Before, between and after having kids, my boobs have changed sizes more times than I can count, and so I consider myself something of a bra expert.

What I've learned about sports bras is that there are two options: your muffin bra (where each breast sits in its own cup) and your pancake bra (where you smoosh both breasts together and down into a highly compressed uni-boob).

When my boobs are bigger, I like to wear a muffin bra like this Berlei Electrify Contour Bra, but when they're smaller I prefer a pancake bra like this Muscle Republic Structure III Bra. I suggest you try both, and a few different brands, and see what makes you feel most supported. A good running bra should not feel bouncy.

Choose a progressive program.

In this, the year of our Lord 2026, there's simply no reason to settle for a running program that doesn't work for you. At last count, there are precisely one billion options, ranging from entirely straightforward and totally free, to highly complex and very expensive.

In my experience, runners who are starting out don't need a plan with a huge amount of detail or data. You might one day want a graph which shows exactly how fast you're running compared with a similar run you did three years previously, but it's not necessary right now — and honestly, it's just more noise and distraction.

The plan I got through Runna was so detailed it gave me a headache, when what I really wanted was a general guide of when to run, and for how long. The simplest approach I've found so far is the KIC app, which has audio-guided programmes for different distance goals, so you can start with the 0-3km and work your way up.

Start slow.

Whatever you, a beginner runner, consider to be a slow running pace, I would like you to run slower than that. If your goal is to develop a sustainable, enjoyable running habit, and ultimately run longer distances, then you're here for a long time, not a good time (sorry). If you have an overwhelming need for speed, choose a program that includes a faster-paced run or some interval training once a week, but try to do most of your runs at a speed you can maintain. Racing out of the gates will end, at best, in burnout, and at worst in injury.

Image: Supplied.

Sort out your storage.

It is remarkably hard for a woman with thighs (read: the kind that sometimes rub together while running) to find a pair of running shorts with a pocket. It is even hard to put anything inside that pocket without your shorts falling down, or your phone banging into your spine with every step. If you can find the elusive pair of perfect pocket running shorts, then please feel free to share them with me, but in the meantime, you may like to get a running belt.

Yes, they are immeasurably dorky. Yes, it's possible I'm wearing mine the wrong way around (are they meant to actually go at the back)? No, I don't care, because I can actually carry my phone and my AirPods and my gels with me when I run.

Stretch.

I know, I know. Stretching is the most boring process known to man. Tragically, it actually helps — both from a performance and an injury-prevention perspective.

I am a die-hard fan of this Yoga With Adriene post-run stretch session which ticks all the boxes: Free, Fast and (You Don't Have To Be Very) Flexible.

Stop comparing yourself.

Apps like Strava are really enjoyable if you are, for example, an Olympic marathon runner. From personal experience, I can attest that there's no doomscroll quite like a Strava doomscroll, where you can watch your peers run faster than the speed of light and then go out for iced lattes afterwards.

If you find it inspirational, that's amazing, but chances are you won't — in which case, just delete the app, and use something else to track your runs.

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Enjoy the runner's high.

Incredible news: the runner's high is not an invented concept! It is real, and fun, and makes you feel good.

I mean, you know. Once you get past the sensation that you might need to throw up.

Feature image: Supplied.