
"I just knew."
It’s the dating advice we hear all the time from loved-up friends. It usually comes with other statements like, "They’re my soulmate" and "I loved them at first sight."
While I’m happy for these people who have had such a profoundly certain experience when it comes to finding love, I also know now that I’ll never be someone who just "knows" anything, especially with matters of the heart.
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For a long time, I thought I was defective. All these people around me were having these revelatory moments where they went on one date with their partner and saw their entire future line up. Clearly, I was meant to hold out for a moment like that, someone I was so certain about that all doubt blew away in the wind.
But I have struggled with anxiety my entire life. As someone who has never been sure about anything (thanks to a near-constant state of mental "what if"), why was I pressuring myself to be certain when it came to love?