No talking, no sharing, no shame. Why every woman should live alone.

I was pregnant with my first child. My partner and I were living in our first little place, together, and he was away for work.

He used to go away for work a lot.

I was lying on the couch, reading something. The house was silent. I was wearing an enormous, bump-forgiving T-shirt, no make-up, no shoes.

I was in heaven. And then I realised.

I WILL NEVER BE ALONE AGAIN.

Yes, the NEVER was a little melodramatic, but that’s pregnancy hormones for you.

And the thought didn’t fill me with warm, mushy feelings. It terrified me.

Rosie’s two cents: Let’s talk about realistic single behaviour. Ain’t none of these on Carrie Bradshaw’s list.

I used to live alone. I call it “the golden age”. As opposed to my current reality, where I live in very close quarters with three other people, two of whom are never conducive to lying on the couch reading a book (because they’re children). Also, letting me do something that wasn’t 100 per cent focussed on them would be a breach of their human rights.

Then there’s my wonderful partner who never goes away for work, because there are children to be looked after and what am I, stupid?

So every now and then, I like to put headphones on, close a door and fantasise about the golden age. And this is what I miss:

1. My house, my rules.

Imagine a time and a place where everything was exactly the way you wanted it ALL THE TIME. That place was my little unit, back in 2008.

2. Secret single food.

Because you’re young, and unattached, you are mostly out. But when you’re home, if you want to eat tuna on toast for breakfast and cereal for dinner, and indulge your passion for fish-finger sandwiches, eaten in bed at 2am, go for it. NO JUDGEMENT.

3. No shame. Whatsoever.

Don’t feel like doing the dishes? Don’t do them. Feel like rearranging your shoes for an entire Saturday afternoon – go for your life. Don’t want to get dressed? Let it all hang out. Who the fuck cares? NO-ONE CAN SEE YOU. And no-one being able to see you is one of life’s most excellent pleasures.

4. Television.

Look, it’s shallow. But the joy of watching what you want to watch on television, and never having to compromise, or hand over the remote, cannot be overstated. For me, that meant NO ZOMBIE MOVIES and back-to-back Buffy marathons. Again, I repeat. NO-ONE WILL EVER KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING.

5. No talking.

Come home from work after a hellish day when everyone from the boss to the barista was against you and you’ve spent all day explaining, explaining, explaining. Close the door. Lie down. Hear the silence. You don’t have to talk to anyone. At all. Until you want to.

6. Total freedom.

Want to stay out all night? Want to stay in on a Saturday night? Want bake cakes into the early hours? Want to put on the most embarrassing music that you love and sing along at the top of your lungs. You can do that. You can do whatever you want, whenever you want to, because you are a grown-up and you live by yourself and your time is your own.

And then, I met my partner, and slowly, slowly, he began to move in. And then we moved in, together. And it was a wonderful thing, and the start of a whole new part of my life. A life that has brought me so much happiness and extremes of ecstasy, chaos and fear. Of course I wouldn’t change it.

But. Every woman should get a taste of the freedom from expectation that a solo stint brings.

Want more? 17 reasons being single is awesome (besides having a Beyonce song dedicated to you).

Sure, there were downsides. Actually, there was one. COST.

I worry that now, for a whole generation of young women, the joy of a period living alone will be a ridiculously, unattainable dream. And believe me, that’s a travesty.

Someone should crowdfund that, stat.

Have you ever lived alone? Would you ever consider it? What’s been your favourite living arrangement, to date?