Do you get 'the ick' more than others? You may have this personality trait.

The ick. Two tiny words. Six letters. And yet, one big universal dating experience that has ruined more romantic potential than bad breath and ghosting combined.

As someone who, pre-2025, spent her entire life in the trenches of the dating scene (oh gosh, the horror!), I've been haunted - scarred, even! - by a handful of dating disasters and subject to the dreaded ick. 

Whether I was on the receiving or giving end of a date, catching the ick felt more inevitable than catching feelings — or flights, for that matter.

WATCH: The ick has even extended to postpartum parenting. Post continues below.

Now, the internet (read: TikTok) has turned the ick into a cultural phenomenon. Think of it as the modern dating version of Darwinism — but instead of survival of the fittest, it's rejection over the smallest, most specific red flag imaginable.

First things first — what is 'the ick'?

Let me paint a picture.

You're on a promising dinner date with someone who's ticking all the boxes. Then it happens. 

Maybe they chew with their mouth open. Maybe they take endless food pics. Maybe they use weird slang that just… gross. 

Suddenly, you can't unsee it. And there's no going back.

The ick is that visceral, gut-level revulsion that swoops in out of nowhere and makes you want to sprint away from someone who, moments earlier, you thought you could maybe, possibly fall in love with.

The ick can even be triggered by completely trivial things that really make no sense — things not objectively bad, but just personally off-putting. People on TikTok have confessed to getting it from things like running for the bus, sipping from a bubbler or eating ice cream with a baby spoon.

Some people even claim to get the ick from someone... wearing socks. No joke.

Whatever your ick is, it's often instant, involuntary and nearly impossible to shake.

So, why do we get the ick — and why do some people get it more than others?

While it's easy to laugh off the ick as a Gen Z dating trend, a 2025 study published in Personality and Individual Differences suggests there's actually a psychological and evolutionary basis behind it.

Researchers analysed 74 men and 51 women aged between 24 and 72, asking whether they were familiar with "the ick" and if they'd experienced it. Participants were also assessed on their personality traits and dating behaviours.

Here's what the study uncovered — and what it suggests the ick might really mean.

Although "the ick" is widely recognised as a modern dating phenomenon, lead authors Brian Collisson, Eliana Saunders and Chloe Yin suggest its roots go way back to our evolutionary instincts.

In an interview with psychologist Dr Mark Travers, they explained the following: "The ick stemmed from the evolution of disgust as a protective mechanism. First, it was against disease, and then it developed in mate selection to help individuals avoid undesirable traits. This aversion was always present — the only difference is that this generation gave it a name."

So, while cavemen and women might have been turned off by a lack of survival and hunting skills, today it's more about someone's socks... or how they eat yoghurt.

Why do some people catch 'the ick' more than others?

Perfectionism.

People with high, rigid standards were more likely to get the ick — and get it intensely.

"While the ick may help people identify potential mate incompatibilities, it may also lead to overly rigid rejection standards," the study found.

Sure, high standards can be great. But perfectionism can make it harder to find and maintain meaningful relationships.

In fact, the researchers noted: "There is an indication that the ick is less about genuine incompatibility, and more about unrealistic expectations and deviation from an ideal partner."

Narcissism.

Participants who scored higher in narcissistic traits were also more prone to the ick, especially when their partner didn't align with their idealised image.

This doesn't mean you're a full-blown narcissist if you catch the ick — rather, in the context of the study, narcissism referred to self-importance, entitlement and a need for admiration. In short, it might just be that your date didn't reflect your desired version of yourself.

And just to reiterate: you're not automatically a narcissist if you catch the ick. 

Disgust sensitivity.

This refers to how strongly someone reacts to things they find off-putting — whether it's physical, emotional or behavioural. The researchers found that higher disgust sensitivity was strongly linked to both the likelihood and frequency of experiencing the ick.

Beyond personality traits. 

Interestingly, the study also found that gender plays a role.

Out of all participants, 63 per cent of women said they were familiar with the term "the ick", compared to just 39 per cent of men.

And when it came to actually experiencing it? Around 75 per cent of women said they had — versus 57 per cent of men.

So, while the ick isn't exclusively a female experience, it's definitely more common amongst women. (We've seen some things. We're tired.)

What to do when you catch 'the ick'?

The ick isn't limited to romantic relationships. It can show up in friendships and work settings, too.

But here's the thing — catching the ick doesn't automatically mean you're overly critical, a narcissist, or a perfectionist.

Sometimes, yes, the ick is a valid gut reaction to something incompatible. But other times? It might be worth pausing to reflect.

Before ghosting someone over how they eat yoghurt, ask yourself: 'Is this truly something I can't overlook? Or am I being a bit too harsh, slightly annoyed, and just projecting unrealistic expectations?'

Chances are, it's the latter.

Sure, listen to the ick. But maybe don't let it cancel every potential connection before it even begins.

Have you caught the ick before? Share your experiences with us in the comments section below.

Feature image: Canva.