The White Lotus just nailed the ugly friendship dynamic we all recognise.

There was something uncomfortably familiar about it.

A carefully honed skill in the art of bitching that, (unfortunately), is something I've only experienced and witnessed in female friendship circles.

Usually in pop-culture depictions of 'mean girls,' the behind-her-back comments and snide remarks are more brash — more out there and obvious. More 'did you hear what so-and-so said/did?' as soon as that person is out of ear's reach.

But the dynamic we watched last night in episode two of The White Lotus season three, managed to nail the more sneaky and calculated way this kind of behaviour can actually play out in real life.

Watch: The White Lotus season three trailer. Post continues below.

As we learnt in episode one, Laurie (Carrie Coon), Jaclyn (Michelle Monaghan), and Kate (Leslie Bibb) have been childhood besties since they were nine. They're on holiday together in Thailand to reconnect and take a break from their busy adult lives.

Jaclyn is a famous Hollywood actress dating a man 10 years her junior, Laurie is a divorced attorney living in New York with her teenage daughter and Kate lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband.

They're all blond, glamorous and overly cutesy and complimentary of each other as they interact with staff at the White Lotus resort. But as soon as it's only two of the group in one room, something interesting happens.

At first, the missing third will be brought up in conversation in a positive light, but then it's like a subtle 'probing' will happen. A gentle testing of the water with a sly backhanded comment, to work out if the other person is willing to have a lil bitch.

Listen to The Quicky discuss all the biggest White Lotus theories. Post continues below.

Here's one said exchange:

"I don't think I've seen Laurie in like four years," Jaclyn tells Kate over a glass of wine late one night.

"She seems great… she looks great," replies Kate. "She always has so much energy."

"I mean she's always just been such a hard charger," Jaclyn agrees. "I love her..."

"She's such a great girl… great friend. Sounded like that divorce got pretty gnarly… that's got to be hard," Kate adds.

"She had to pay him palimony, right? Why?? Can you imagine? I'd be furious! After he free-loaded off her for years," says Jaclyn.

"And I guess the whole thing's been really hard on Ellie, which is so sad… because she was such an adorable little girl… but I guess she's turned into a real… Yeah," Kate hints.

"What?" Jaclyn asks.

"Apparently she's been kicked out of two schools. She's like a hitter… a bruiser," Kate tests.

"Oh noooo," Jaclyn replies, clearly buying in.

"She throws furniture," Kate continues, clearly getting the okay from Jaclyn's reaction to continue down this route.

"You have to wonder about these people who insist on raising their kids in New York. I mean what are they thinking? The kids can't play, there's no childhood. They're all like sucking each other off at like eight years old."

"I'm sure they're doing that in Texas too, Kate," Jaclyn laughs.

"But you know… Laurie's work is there, and she's always defined herself by her work so… I guess it's good she has that," Kate concludes.

And with that little 'gentle' bitch in the bag, the two women dive right in. It's Jaclyn's turn for a jab.

"Don't you remember how she was talking about how she was going to get that big promotion? They were going to make her partner," she tells Kate.

"What are you saying?" Kate replies, leaning in.

"I'm saying I don't think it happened… I think she's kind of stalled out there. I mean you devote your whole life to one firm... world's brutal," says Jaclyn.

"No wonder she looks defeated," Kate replies.

"I thought you said she looked great?" Jaclyn hints.

"Well… she does… but she also looks tired. Don't you think?" Kate asks.

"It might be the drinking," says Jaclyn.

"She did drink like a whole bottle tonight," Kate comments.

"…more than that," Jaclyn replies.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by The White Lotus (@thewhitelotus)

I felt dirty watching this scene play out. Because I think it's something most of us can unfortunately relate to; either as the target or the perpetrator.

In my experience, bitchiness always starts subtly — just like is depicted in The White Lotus. It begins with a few comments here and there and gradually turns into a vendetta or a group ganging up on one person. What starts as something minor, turns into a fixation by the other people in the group; constantly waiting to see the next time their target slips up so they can feed back to the others. A gradual poisoning of someone's character by 'connecting' with others on their perceived faults.

The difference here is there's not one target. Jaclyn, Laurie and Kate are all bitching about each other, making them an even more insidious example.

When I was a teenager, I remember hoping this kind of behaviour would finish as soon as I graduated. I learnt pretty quickly 'bitchiness' is something that some people never grow out of.

I've confronted people before; friends I've caught bitching about me. Often they're shocked at what I repeat back to them — like they just got caught up in the fun of having a little gossip. But what The White Lotus shows us, is how quickly a quick comment or a slight critique can turn into nastiness.

Psychology tells us that engaging in negative chat can give us a small dopamine hit. I assume that's why bitchiness can get so out of control — it's addictive. It can be easy to get swept up in being on the 'inside' rather than the 'outside'. No one wants to be on the outside.

Very quickly on The White Lotus, as the women get more comfortable, their mean comments get nastier and nastier.

"Did she sandblast her face? It's very waxy," Kate asks Laurie, while Jaclyn is out of earshot in the bedroom.

She follows it up with "she's still gorgeous," as if that somehow negates or makes up for what she's just said.

Bitchiness is one of those insidious pastimes that's never going to leave. It follows us into boardrooms and school pickup and nursing homes. It's a gross reality of living in this world, and it's particularly evident in female circles.

The White Lotus shows us how easily it can happen. How slippery a slope it can be. How innocently it can start.

Jaclyn, Laurie and Kate really are the ultimate mean girls. The perfect mix of playing nice and staying 'friendly,' while also weaving in some truly awful jabs against people they call friends.

Right now, they're showing us just how ugly female friendship can be.

May this type of girl's trip never find me….

Before you go, listen to the Mamamia Out Loud hosts talking about this friendship here:

Feature image: Binge.