The definitive guide on when you're allowed to cancel plans.

This post was originally published in The Outlouders newsletter.

I'm not going to lie, depending on my mood (or what stage I'm in on my menstrual cycle), I either love a cancellation or… I really, really hate it. I'm also willing to confess that I'm extremely biased when it comes to cancelling plans. When I cancel plans, I have a really good reason. However, if someone cancels on me? How dare you.

Of course, things happen that you are in zero control of. Family emergencies, an unpredicted migraine, or a dangerous weather warning… are all absolutely fine and acceptable reasons to cancel on a person or an event.

But what about the in-between things? The things you just cannot be bothered to go to as it leads up to the day of? Well, do not worry (I know you've been stressing about this you're entire life), I've created a do's and don't's list on some very specific social situations. I have strong opinions (loosely held) on exactly when you can and can't cancel plans. Allow me to present my Official Guide To Cancelling.

Watch: What type of friend are you? Post continues below.

A first date: The latest is 8am the day of.

Your mum's birthday lunch: You can never cancel.

Drinks with the girls: Two hours before if you all live close (the morning of if someone has to travel over 40 minutes to get there).

Someone's big birthday (lots of people): The morning of if you have a really good excuse.

Someone's small birthday (sit-down dinner vibes): You can't cancel.

The birth of your baby: If you're the one giving birth, you can't cancel (sorry). If you're the one who isn't giving birth— YOU ALSO CAN'T CANCEL YOU SILLY GOOSE.

A casual stroll: If it's a common activity, then you can cancel whenever. If your friend has asked for a walk out of the blue, you can't cancel at all— she's going through something.

A concert/show: You can't cancel. If you do, it's your responsibility to find someone to take your ticket. That person has to be known and liked by the person you're cancelling on.

An event where you only know one person: If that one person also only knows you, you can't cancel. If that one person knows other people, you can cancel at any time.

Sexy time with your situationship: Dependant on how much time they put into their hair removal/exfoliation/moisturising routine, two hours.

Watching the footy with your partner's friends: Just don't show up if you really don't want to go. They won't remember either way.

Your child's award ceremony: If they're receiving an award, you can't cancel. If they're not, lie and say you were there the whole time.

A phone call with your Nana: Well you have to call her to let her know that you need to cancel so you may as well just do the phone call, no?

Your workout class: Literally whenever you want. You will do burpees when you want to do burpees.

Coffee with your cousin who you're not entirely sure how you're related to: If they've travelled to see you then I'm sorry, you can't cancel. It's an hour of your life, just do it. If they don't have to travel far, you can cancel the day before.

A doctor's appointment: You can cancel a few days before (but make sure you get that mole checked out eventually).

A restaurant booking: You can cancel anytime but if the person who made the booking gets charged— you need to pay them.

I hope this helps (please don't tell me it didn't, my ego won't be able to take it).

Happy cancelling!

If you want more from Emily Vernem, you can follow her on Instagram @emilyvernem.

Feature image: Canva.