Myah was blindsided when her boyfriend broke up with her. Then she found out about 'future faking'.

"We had talked a lot about all these things we were going to do together — projects, movies we would watch, places we would go, me moving to his part of town, how we felt about marriage and kids. We had come up with silly t-shirt ideas and had a 'to-do list' where we logged all these wants — but they never happened."

Sound familiar? A lot of people can related to Myah's experience — and it wasn't until her boyfriend broke up with her that Myah realised she was a victim of a damaging manipulation tactic known as "future faking".

Watch: Signs you're dating a narcissist. Post continues after video.

"Future faking is a term commonly used to describe when someone in a relationship alludes to a future vision for the relationship, without the genuine intention of, or plan to, create that vision," psychologist Amy Brown told Mamamia.

"It's often used as a way to control the other person in the relationship, making promises based on what they believe that person desires in order to keep them in the relationship or to get them to do what that person wants."

Along with a manipulation tactic, future faking is also a form of "emotional abuse", Brown said.

"By design, it can confuse and overwhelm the person on the receiving end."

However, while commonly associated with people who have narcissistic personality traits, future faking is not exclusive to narcissists. "People can fall into behaviour that may look, on the outside, like future faking for a whole multitude of reasons," explained Brown.

"For example, those who tend towards more anxiously attached coping might be fearful of losing their partner and might make promises out of desperation."

Signs of future faking in relationships.

So, how can we discern whether a partner is future faking or making genuine plans for the future?

It's complex, explained the psychologist.

"Because we only ever get to see the outward observable behaviours of someone else, we are then often assuming or adding the 'story' behind what they were thinking and their intentions behind the behaviours ourselves," she said. But a good place to start, she added, is by "looking for patterns of big promises made with no follow through", and also considering the timing of those promises.

"Are the promises only made when you threaten to leave or bring up poor behaviour?" Brown said.

"Does it feel like they are being used as a tool to reel you back in or control you in some way? How do you feel about the relationship overall? Do you feel valued, respected and supported?"

If you suspect your partner is future faking to control or manipulate you, it's important to communicate clearly, set boundaries, seek support, and then decide on next steps.

Depending on how severe your situation is, Brown recommends reaching out to a mental health professional.

"They are best placed to help you to understand if you are being manipulated within your relationship and how this is impacting you, and they can help you decide how you would like to approach the situation from there. Please remember, manipulation is a form of emotional abuse, and it could mean you are in an unsafe relationship," she told Mamamia.

So, can a relationship recover if future faking is identified? It's possible.

"Whether the relationship can evolve into a healthy supportive one with a future that both partners are working towards together as a team is a question of a few things," said Brown.

"Firstly, was there true 'future faking' by a partner with absolutely no intention of fulfilling those plans, and who was only intent on manipulating and confusing you to keep you in the relationship? Or was your partner making promises that they would ideally like to fulfil, but they feel overwhelmed, have some of their own blocks coming up, haven't really taken the time to work out what they want from life, or are struggling with communication?"

These two scenarios, she said, are very different — and the second one can be addressed in couples' therapy.

"My advice for anyone in the first situation is to please speak with a mental health professional. They will help ensure you are safe and give you the space to unpack your experiences without the effect of the manipulation making it hard for you to think straight."

Feature Image: Getty.