'My sister won't let me come to her wedding unless I pay a "wedding tax."'

When Emily announced she was engaged to be married, her older sister was, of course, over the moon.

It was to be a beautiful, intimate ceremony, filled with love. What wasn't there to be happy about?

However, things soon became less joyous when Emily asked a strange request of her sister.

Watch: What to bring in your bridal makeup bag. Post continues after video.

"They decided to impose a 'wedding tax' on family members attending," the sister, who chose to remain anonymous, wrote on the sub-Reddit Am I The Jerk.

"They have a list of 'wedding expenses' — things like venue decor and catering — and they expect each family member to contribute extra to make it all happen," she continued.

"To top it off, her fiancé's family is also chipping in, making the whole thing feel less like a celebration and more like a business deal."

Stunned at her sister's request, the Reddit user couldn't bite her tongue.

"I told her it felt unfair to ask family to cover the costs on top of giving a gift," she shared. "I suggested maybe doing a more budget-friendly wedding so that everyone could enjoy it, but she brushed aside my suggestions.

"We had a huge argument about it, and it turned into a shouting match. I told her that weddings should be about love, not financial burdens."

From there, things got very tense between the sisters. Emily refused to speak to her older sister for weeks, even blocking her phone number.

"I felt really hurt, but then I received an invitation to the wedding — complete with a note saying that if I wasn't 'chipping in,' I shouldn't bother coming.

Since receiving the message from her sister, the Reddit poster has been debating whether or not to attend the wedding.

"On one hand, I want to support my sister, but on the other hand, I feel like it's really messed up to so blatantly ask for cash from family.

"My parents think I should just suck it up, contribute, and attend for the sake of family, while my friends are telling me I'd be better off skipping it altogether."

After sharing her story on Reddit, the woman received an influx of comments about her situation, most of which shared the same sentiment.

"I would absolutely not attend. Your sister doesn't want your support, she wants your money," the top comment read.

"I'd go and not chip in," another added. "My sister better have paid for a bouncer, I'd bring a gift too, just so if she kicked me out I'd have a chance to be EXTRA petty and take it back."

A third penned: "I would not attend. If you can't afford your wedding you shouldn't be having that wedding. Where did this 'pay to attend a wedding' come from? It's ridiculous."

Yes, indeed, where did it come from? 

We were equally curious, so we reached out to a wedding expert to ask the question on all of our lips: Is a "wedding tax" the latest thing? 

"While I've heard of couples asking their parents for contributions towards the wedding, and guests to a honeymoon fund, asking family to chip in for things like venue decor and catering is definitely unusual," shared Wendy El-Khoury from Wedded Wonderland.

"I understand that weddings can be expensive; I think it's important to remember that a wedding is a celebration, not a fundraiser. Guests are already giving gifts to celebrate the happy couple, so asking for extra cash can feel a bit like double-dipping. It's really important for couples to be mindful of their guests' budgets and make sure everyone feels comfortable and able to celebrate with them."

Though a wedding tax is unorthodox, it's important to remember wedding etiquette isn't black and white. Traditions can depend on culture, families, finances, and more.

"These days, it's much more common for couples to pay for their own weddings or to share some expenses with both families," El-Khoury told Mamamia. "However, asking guests including siblings, partners and extended family and friends to contribute directly to specific things like flowers or catering is generally considered a breach of wedding etiquette."

Not only are guests probably already gifting presents from a registry, a wedding tax can create an obligation.

"Guests might feel pressured to contribute, even if it strains their budget," El-Khoury said. "It also changes the focus. A wedding should be a celebration of love and commitment, not a fundraising event.

"Let's not forget that attending a wedding can be a pricey endeavour in itself. Think outfit, hair, makeup, maybe even a spray tan... then there's babysitting, travel, possibly time off work — it all adds up."

That being said, it's easy to sympathise with brides and grooms given the rising costs of weddings and living in general. And it's certainly not the first time we've seen couples asking for money in creative ways. Just recently, a bride and groom popped their bank details on their wedding invitations (more on that here).

"Weddings are getting more and more expensive, and let's face it, more complex," El-Khoury said. "We've got multi-day wedding extravaganzas, destination weddings, and what we're calling the 'wedding festival' — the options are endless! It's completely understandable that couples are looking for ways to make things more affordable."

There are, however, other ways of sticking to your budget without imposing a wedding tax on guests. El-Khoury advised keeping the guest list small, considering more affordable venues like parks and museums, swapping fancy decorations for DIY crafts, and choosing a weekday or off-season wedding date. 

If couples still need financial support, there are ways to ask without alienating their guests — including honeymoon funds or crowdfunding. 

"Guests are usually happy to contribute to a honeymoon fund," El-Khoury said. "It's a fun way to help the couple create amazing memories. And if there's something really special that you're saving for (like a live band or a photo booth), you could try crowdfunding for that specific item.

"Just be open and honest," the wedding expert added. "If you're worried about wedding costs, talk to your family and friends openly about your budget and explore different options together. That way, everyone can be part of creating a wedding that's both beautiful and affordable."

Feature Image: Getty