'I don't want my kids to be afraid of me.' Hundreds of Australian men admit to violent side.

2024 was one of the worst years on record for women killed in domestic violence incidents.

Last year, 78 women were killed due to gender-based violence, according to Destroy the Joint's project Counting Dead Women. That number was 64 in 2023, and 56 in 2022.

While years of advocacy have aimed to change the threat to women in this country, the statistics show we've fallen woefully short.

Now, new data shows that some Australian men are admitting they need to change. Admitting that they are a danger to their families, and fear what will happen if they fly off the handle.

That is according to statistics from the NSW Government's Men's Behaviour Change Program, which has seen nearly 2,000 men across the state raise their hands and say, "I need help".

The program is specifically designed to help men who've been violent or abusive towards their partners and families learn how to stop. Think of it as a practical toolkit for breaking the cycle of violence.

Between 2022 and 2024, 1,800 men participated in the program. Now, the state government has expanded access to seven new locations, making it available across 35 locations through 15 providers.

Watch: Can you spot the red flags of domestic violence? Post continues below.

One man who completed the program shared a powerful message.

"I don't want to be that person," he told a government evaluation summary of the program. "I don't want my kids to be afraid of me or my wife not to love me, or eventually destroy my family because of my actions or the way that I speak or the way that I act. It's explosive."

Another said, "I was always edgy around my children, and I didn't feel like a very good father since they were born and always second guessed myself with everything to do with them.

"So, I'm even more conscious, these days, when I see my kids, that I've got to really make the effort to stay calm and do the right thing by them."

It's about abusers taking accountability and breaking the cycle of violence by working with men to develop strategies to stop them from using violence, Minister for Prevention of Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Jodie Harrison said.

The numbers tell an important story.

Between 2016 and 2017, program participants aged between 21 and 66. 56 per cent were self-referrals to the program, according to the evaluation.

65 per cent of them had a current mandatory or additional apprehended violence order.

Perhaps most powerfully, the partners of these men are starting to see real change.

One partner shared: "At first, I was still feeling the blame, but now... he's actually taking responsibility for what he did."

"You can actually see him stop for a second and actually think about what he's going to say next instead of just blurting out the first thing," another added. "It's been a big change within the house as well because we're not all walking on eggshells anymore."

Elizabeth Shaw from Relationships Australia NSW (one of the program providers) puts it perfectly: "These men have recognised the need to change and have sought support to become safer partners and fathers.

"Through the program, they reflect on their behaviour, understand the underlying drivers of violence, and learn practical tools and strategies to manage themselves and de-escalate potentially aggressive situations," she said.

The program doesn't just work with men — it supports their current or former partners and children too.

"Many have shared with us that they are now living in safe and respectful homes, free from violence," Shaw added.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, please call 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) for 24/7 support.

Feature image: Getty.