Vincent Fantauzzo emailed Heath Ledger his Archibald-winning portrait. Hours later, he turned on the TV.

For years, Vincent Fantauzzo has been haunted by ghosts. Not the supernatural kind, but the kind that live within — memories etched permanently into his mind, feelings he can't seem to shake, no matter how bright the spotlight shines.

From the outside, his life is picture-perfect. A renowned portrait artist whose career skyrocketed with his 2008 portrait of friend Heath Ledger, winning the People's Choice Award at the Archibald Prize — the first of many accolades that would follow.

His marriage to beloved actress Asher Keddie completes what seems an idyllic existence as they raise Luca, Vincent's first child, alongside their son Valentino.

But beneath the exterior lies a man shaped by darkness. The shadows that, paradoxically, helped mix the palette from which he now creates beauty.

Listen to his interview with Kate Langbroek on Mamamia's No Filter. Post continues below.

Growing up in a "rough" suburb of Melbourne, violence was Fantauzzo's constant companion.

"In my little mind, I couldn't leave. I was afraid people were going to break into our house every day," he told Kate Langbroek on No Filter.

"There was violence in the street… If you went to the milk bar or the fish and chip shop, someone had to stand guard… It was really like you couldn't escape it."

Home offered no sanctuary. Behind closed doors, he tried desperately to protect his mother from his father's abuse.

"You see your mum is a prisoner and scared," he said. "It's what you know is happening behind the doors, or at night when you're asleep."

When his mother finally escaped with him and his siblings to a housing commission home, poverty tightened its grip. Throughout school, Fantauzzo couldn't read or write. No homework completed. No books read. No classes passed.

"I couldn't even spell my own address. I don't know if, I can't remember if I could even spell my own name. I didn't know what day it was. I couldn't even spell the days of the week."

With no purpose and plummeting self-confidence, he found his "currency" in fighting.

"When you're a kid and your self-confidence is low, you're looking desperately for a place. And if you're good at being bad, and you get encouraged by your mates, then you become more bad," he said.

"I'd get into a fight and I'd win."

Fantauzzo is opening up about his childhood in his new memoir, Unveiled. Image: Supplied.

By 13, Fantauzzo was expelled from school. His mum never forced him to go back. His father, in a rare moment of intervention, helped him secure a job at what appeared to be a pizza business.

"They were drug dealers," Fantauzzo said. "They would deal drugs, and I would help them."

"I did my apprenticeship in crime, and I was good at it.

"I was at that point where I would have been very good down that dark road."

But fate intervened when he discovered boxing through a chance encounter.

"We walked past, and I just looked in there, and it's like it called out to me," he recalled.

"For the first time, I got to use this stuff that I could do well in a positive way."

The gym became his sanctuary, where coach Jack Rennie set the first meaningful boundaries in his life. Around this time, his cousin Enzo introduced him to drawing, planting the seed for his future.

"Growing up when you don't have a lot, I wanted a way to get out and to be successful," he said. "Turns out that painting was my way."

The portrait that changed everything.

Years later, a friendship with Heath Ledger would alter Fantauzzo's trajectory forever. After years of discussion, Ledger finally agreed to sit for a portrait in 2007.

Over that weekend in Perth, the two men shared their deepest vulnerabilities.

"It was like a confession thing," Fantauzzo said.

"We had a very special chemistry that you just feel like, 'Oh, f***, someone understands me', and we both did."

As they parted, Ledger's words proved prophetic: "This portrait is going to change our lives."

"It's just a portrait, you think," Fantauzzo said. "It changed my life; every day of my life."

Fantauzzo worked obsessively for three weeks. The night he finished, he emailed it to Ledger.

"[The portrait] was the same size as my television… and I had it next to my TV," he said. "I went to bed and I turned the TV on, and there it is. Heath's passed away."

Amidst his grief, Fantauzzo was fielding calls from the media wanting to see the portrait. He was left with the question: Should he enter it in the Archibald Prize like Ledger wanted?

"I heard Heath's voice in my head like, 'F***, you're entering it. I didn't do that for nothing, neither did you'," Fantauzzo recalled.

With Ledger's father's blessing, Fantauzzo submitted the portrait.

"To have one of the highest points of my career at that time, and having it attached to the loss of someone that meant so much to me and to everyone else… it's still very bittersweet."

That painting launched Fantauzzo's career, leading to him earning the People's Choice Award four times and the Doug Moran National Portrait Prize twice and painting portraits of Brandon Walters, Matt Moran, and Baz Luhrmann, among others.

Fantauzzo with the portrait of Heath Ledger. Image: Getty.

Finding Asher while hiding himself.

Another life-changing moment came in 2012 when chef Matt Moran connected him with Asher Keddie for a portrait.

"I was trying to clean the studio, and I was rolling out the wheelie bins looking like a mess. And then I see Asha. I think I dropped the bins, and that was kind of it."

They married two years later in Fiji, with his son Luca by their side. In 2015, they welcomed their son Valentino.

Yet as his family life blossomed, Fantauzzo carried a crushing secret. He had been abused as a child and had never told anyone.

"I can't even talk about it in detail," he said.

"It wasn't just one moment, but it can be one moment in someone's life… and it could go on for years… they're stuck with a reaction to everything that happens in their daily life."

The shame consumed him.

"You feel disgusted in yourself," he reflected. "You feel ashamed, you feel like you can't tell anyone. Why can't I tell anyone? Because maybe I deserved it."

"No one wants damaged goods and my damaged goods. So I'll keep it to myself."

For ten years, he kept this from Asher, while the trauma infiltrated every aspect of his life.

"My kid goes for a sleepover and I can't sleep… You meet someone, and you see something, and you're suspicious, and they might not deserve your suspicion," he said.

Fantauzzo met Keddie when he painted her portrait. Image: Getty.

Finally opening up to Asher lifted an enormous weight. She was angry for him. She still is.

"It just gave her maybe a bit more perspective on my reactions generally to things," he said.

Now, in his memoir Unveiled, Fantauzzo has exposed his full journey from street-fighting criminal to celebrated artist.

"Throughout my life, a lot of stuff was swept under the rug, and I just got f***ing sick of it. And I thought, I gotta I write it down, and then I won't have to talk about it," he said.

Despite his professional success, Fantauzzo measures achievement differently now.

"The ultimate is that one day my kids look at me and they're proud of me, and they say they love me. That's my ultimate success."

Feature image: Getty/AAP.