'Turns out there are 6 different types of people pleasers. Mine has sent me into a spiral.'

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If there's one thing I'm a sucker for, it's a quiz.

No, not the general knowledge kind. Ew.

I'm talking about personality quizzes.

You know, the ones that tell you your Gilmore Girls character based on your favourite snack?

That is academia. 

So when Mamamia's Associate Editor Emily Vernem brought a new personality quiz to my attention, I jumped at yet another chance to psychoanalyse myself into an existential crisis.

Another wild Saturday night!

Speaking on a subscriber episode of Mamamia Out Loud, Em told her co-hosts Holly Wainwright and Jessie Stephens about a Bustle quiz which determines what type "people pleaser" you are.

I already knew it would send me into an internal spiral.

The quiz was created by psychotherapist Meg Josephson, who wrote a book called Are You Mad At Me? How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You. 

Yep, definitely going to spiral.

Watch: Are you a people pleaser? Post continues after video.

When sharing the quiz, Josephson told Bustle that "people pleasers aren't born, they're made."

"Maybe we grew up in homes where keeping the peace meant avoiding conflict, or where being helpful, agreeable, perfect or 'good' earned us love and approval," she said.

This instinct, according to the psychotherapist, is known as the "fawn response" and is a way for our nervous system to protect us from real or perceived threats.

According to Josephson, there are six types of people pleasers. They are:

• The Peacekeeper: The one who smooths things over.

• The Caretaker: The one who puts others before themselves.

• The Perfectionist: The one who seeks safety by being 'perfect.'

• The Performer: The one who diffuses tension by cracking jokes.

• The Chameleon: The one who just says what someone wants to hear.

• The Lone Wolf: The one who finds safety in solitude.

This is where the quiz comes in. Basically, you're given 12 different scenarios, like: 'Your boss messages you "Can we talk?" What's your first thought?'

(*cough* I'm fired *cough).

For each scenario, you pick from four different responses. Then, at the end, you tally up your answers. And, presto, you find out what type of "people pleaser" you are.

Of course, I gave it a go. And my answers were all over the bloody place. I had at least one response in every category (how very Libra of me).

In the end, I fell into The Perfectionist camp, followed closely by The Chameleon and The Lone Wolf.

According to Josephson, being a Perfectionist people pleaser means "you're driven, responsible, and deeply attuned to expectations."

"Growing up, you likely learned that love was earned through achievement, performance, or getting things 'right.' As a result, you may fear failure or rejection, and hide your true feelings behind polished success," she said.

Ahh yes, the spiral begins.

The psychotherapist went on to say that perfectionists hold themselves to "impossibly high standards, often without even realising" which can be "exhausting and disheartening."

Overall, I'd say The Perfectionist category is pretty accurate to my "people pleasing" tendencies. Though, as I've gotten older, I'd like to think I'm less concerned about moulding my behaviour to appease others. That's not to say I have a blatant disregard for others, just that I don't over apologise as much.

And yet, even writing that little caveat feels like an attempt at people pleasing. I don't want you, the reader, thinking I'm some nihilistic, unmannered menace to society! Or a self-obsessed Gen Z who doesn't give up her seat for elderly people. I swear I'm pleasant!

(Clearly I have some work to do).

Because, yes, there are downsides to being a people pleaser.

Speaking on Mamamia Out Loud, Holly explained how people pleasing can lead to a certain resentment.

Listen to the full episode below. Post continues afterwards.

"Very often, depending on your degree of people-pleasing, and I'm talking about myself in this context, you can get resentful, grumpy, martyrish," she said.

"Because you're kind of like… I'm doing all this for you and you're not even noticing me."

Jessie agreed, referencing an idea she'd read that people pleasers "outsource tension" to avoid discomfort, rather than being clear with their intentions.

"Saying no to someone is a really clear and kind thing to do," she said. "What isn't kind is to half commit and promise something you can't deliver on because you don't want to be awkward in the moment."

For Holly, people pleasing is about striking a balance.

"I think that caring too much about what people think about you is not healthy. But not caring at all what people think about you makes you a psychopath."

Hear, hear.

As for Josephson, the psychotherapist clarified that her quiz isn't intended to pigeon-hole, but rather to help us "better understand" ourselves.

"Examining these tendencies can help you bring this unconscious pattern into your conscious awareness," she told Bustle. "Not to fix or change who you are, but to meet yourself with more compassion, and start to please yourself, too."

Feature Image: Supplied