'There's food in the pantry.' 5 very specific things parents say to their kids multiple times a day.

I sometimes feel like a broken record... no, like, literally. 

I start off all sing-songy in the morning and as the day progresses, my tune becomes flatter and then ultimately, completely scratched. 

My beautiful girls are 11 and two, and their age gap means their needs are very different. Whilst I’m learning to tame a tween entering puberty, I’m also in the eye of the storm potty training a toddler.

Reading many parenting books over the years, I've quickly learned that repetition is often the key to something sticking. Or so the ~fancy~ parenting books say.

But to the professors who share this insight, I have one question for you: if repetition is the key, then why am I repeating the same simple things every single day? Surely it should have stuck by now. Am I using the wrong tone? Am I leaving out key words? Do my kids just not like me?!

And these phrases seem to be universal. Not only am I saying them, but I'm pretty – no, definitely – sure I sometimes hear my neighbour say them too? Heck, my mum said these things to me growing up. 

The list is exhaustive, but these are some of my favourites (read: most used). 

"There’s food in the pantry."

I often find myself wondering if my kids are bulking for a bodybuilding competition. They are constantly asking for food, especially after school and daycare. The food we have in the house, however, never seems to be what they feel like eating. It's almost as if their favourite activity ever consists of them swinging off the pantry door, whining, “I’m hungry, there’s nothing to eeeaaaattttt”. And this is even after I have literally just spent $300 on groceries.

But while I'm not exactly convinced repetition is the answer to all parenting problems, I've learned a little bit about solving the inevitable hangriness that seems to latch onto them as they leave the school gates. 

What's that, you ask? Well, let me introduce you to one of our house's favourites: Bakers Delight. 

Once they discover these goodies sitting on the countertop, they're pretty good at keeping the complaining to a minimum so I can speedily finish off my last couple of hours of work.

Image: Bakers Delight.

Bakers Delight's breads, snacks and treats are baked fresh every day and there's more than 500 bakeries across the country so you'll never have to be without. Their Hi-Fibre Lo-GI bread is insanely delicious, while also providing real, longer-lasting energy to growing tummies. 

As soon as my daughter gets home from school, the same afternoon pointing routine begins. It goes a little like this: 

Bag is propped up on the bench stool. 

"That doesn't live there."

Lunchbox (unpacked) is thrown on the sink.

"That doesn't live there!"

Hat is frisbee'd into the middle of the floor.

"That also doesn't live there."

Jacket is flung over one of the dining room chairs.

"Well, that definitely doesn't live there!"

It sort of sounds like the chorus to a rap song... it’s just not as fun to dance to.

Image: Supplied.

"Put your washing in the basket."

Washing. It’s the bane of my existence and probably every other parents' too. Add in a daughter who is potty training and another who plays every sport under the sun, and you've got yourself a whole lot of washing. Sigh. 

It’s one of my 11 year-old’s chores to bring her washing down every evening after she has a shower. Does this happen as planned? Not exactly. 

Instead, she seems to be on a mission to create the world's largest clothes mountain in the corner of our bathroom.

Every morning, noon, and night I ask her to bring down her washing and she will have a delay tactic ready: "I just have to finish drawing this mermaid" or "after I brush my teeth".

She is so against bringing down her washing, that I let it pile up as a way to inconvenience her when she’s looking for something. Just last week when I was hanging out the washing, I ran out of pegs because she had 21 pairs of undies to be hung out. Yep, 21. 

In the end, I find myself just shouting "WASHING!" and she hurls herself up the stairs and delivers the pile of stench to the laundry. I won’t lie though, I do love it when, in her hastiness, she drops a crop top or two down the stairs and needs to return multiple times to pick them up.

"Don't eat off the floor."

I’m happy to say that this (now) only applies to my 2-year-old. Cheese is her favourite floor food. Or as we like to call it, Floor Cheese.

Of course, we keep our floors as clean as we can in a house of four busy individuals but still, there’s just something that icks me about eating something off a place where our feet roam free (or more accurately, bare). 

Every night like clockwork when I’m preparing dinner, the little person will appear between my legs, eyes fixated on the kitchen bench where I am cutting up ingredients. Then, when something falls off the chopping board, she is like a fielder on the SCG pitch, catching that off-cut before it even hits the ground. But when it does, she happily gets down on all fours and picks it up... with her mouth.

"I'm going to give you three seconds."

The countdown. Ugh. You think they would learn after the first 50 times but nope, this little routine goes on every single time books are thrown across the room, beds aren’t made, and the table STILL only has placemats on it while severely lacking the necessary plates and cutlery. 

I say this more with my youngest as a result of her haphazardly hurling items she no longer wants to play with across the lounge room. Or when she whirlwinds through the kitchen and swipes every single alphabet magnet off the fridge, sending them flying across the floor.

Image: Supplied.

She starts off smiling, as if she knows that I am about to say it. And when I do, she literally waits ‘til the last vowel comes out of my mouth before starting to whizz around to pick things up. By 3pm my throat is in desperate need of a cup of tea.

Being a mum is a privilege that I never take for granted. But I tell you, gee I wish I could sit down and watch my own TV show for more than five minutes without being told “I want to watch my show”!

For over 40 years, Bakers Delight has baked fresh bread and goodies kids actually want to eat. Visit one of the 500+ stores across Australia. 

Feature Image: Supplied.