
I’ve been attracted to women for as long as I can remember.
But it wasn’t till my mid-thirties, I realised I was gay.
Like a lot of late-bloomer lesbians (women who come out later in life), I was never repulsed by men, and took this as a sign I was straight. So, I leaned into being the cool, hot girl who did all the things guys liked in bed (and wrote a successful sex column about it!), even if I felt oddly anesthetised doing them.
While you're here, watch these nine powerful individuals share what it's like to be a lesbian. Story continues after video.
It wasn’t until I stumbled across a YouTube video explaining something called "compulsory heterosexuality" – the theory that heterosexuality is enforced upon women in a patriarchal culture that teaches us to covet male validation – I realised I’d always wanted men to desire me, but had never actually experienced sexual desire for a man.
Two years since I made that life-changing revelation and came out (first privately, then publicly), I’ve continued to receive messages of support from women who’ve gone through their own queer awakening as a result of reading my story.
The response from men, though, hasn’t been quite as uplifting.