This one moment in The Golden Bachelor proves what the real stakes are.

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As a divorcee in her forties, I am very much here for The Golden Bachelor. It's the wholesome, hopeful distraction we didn't know we needed right now.

Our golden Bach is Barry 'Bear' Myrden, a 61-year-old widower who lost his wife 14 years ago and has three grown sons.

He's a little mild for my taste, but I'm loving the mostly spicy, gorgeous cast of women who range from 51 to 66.

I'm squealing with delight over their relatable oversharing chats about bunions, hot flushes and divorce. It's brilliant — how didn't we get here sooner?

Watch: The cast of The Golden Bachelor on their first impressions of Bear.

But I'll admit I've been experiencing mild discomfort at the rose ceremonies.

There's something disheartening about seeing a group of fierce, brilliant women who have lost husbands and periods, all waiting to be chosen by one man.

But alas, I can't — won't — stop or look away.

The Muriel's Wedding themed shoot. Image: Nine Network.

There was a moment in last night's episode that shook me. It made everything more real and highlighted just how much these women have at stake.

Some of them were chosen to participate in a photoshoot with Bear, inspired by love stories on the silver screen.

For a Muriel's Wedding-themed shoot, Shamse, a 60-year-old interior designer, was dressed as the bride. Bear acknowledged the elephant in the room: "I was here once before, and I didn't think I'd be here so soon, but here we are."

Shamse revealed to Bear she had "butterflies in her tummy," but you could see her emotions unravelling as she grappled with feelings bubbling to the surface.

Image: Nine Network

In a confessional, she revealed feeling 'guilty' about being there. She'd been married nearly 40 years, and her husband had passed away recently — it was still "very, very raw."

That's when it sunk in. The gravity of what we're witnessing here. Watching someone's vulnerability and grief unfold on screen, I found myself tearing up.

These aren't twenty-somethings looking for Instagram followers or their first shot at real love.

These people have lived, loved and lost. The stakes are infinitely higher. There's grief, trauma, children, exes — it's complicated.

When you've survived the end of a marriage, you become more resilient. You've learnt the lessons. With age comes wisdom, as the saying goes.

But it also feels scarier in some ways. You aren't looking to build a life with someone – you've already built one.

You're facing the possibility of sharing a life with someone, which gets more complex as we get older. There are more layers, people and moving parts.

And the alternative? Well, as Carrie Bradshaw reminded us recently in the finale of And Just Like That there's a difference between being alone and being on your own.

But, for anyone who has navigated the age-appropriate dating swamp that are dating apps, you feel me.

And you too, realise this is also a possibility.

The moment that tipped Shamse.

Bear got down on one knee and put a wedding ring on Shamse's finger. As someone who is (happily) out of a marriage just over three years ago, I would find being dressed in a wedding dress on a wedding set with a man down on one knee a bit much.

Let alone if I were a recent widow.

Then Shamse revealed she hasn't dated another man since losing her husband 17 months ago.

All of a sudden, I felt sick. 17 months after the end of my marriage, I was still dipping in and out of healing. The wound was not yet a scar.

I can't imagine losing your husband after 40 years of marriage — not because you didn't want to be married to him anymore, but because he died.

I want to tell Shamse about the "first bad pancake theory" – that the first one after a big loss is usually a bit of a mess. I've had a few wonky, burnt pancakes myself these past three years.

Katrina, a 55-year-old NICU nurse and fellow contestant who was also on the shoot, said in her confessional: "Being dressed to the nines in a wedding dress would be confronting."

"I think there's probably a million emotions that this dress could bring up in a lot of people."

And it did. Shamse ran off from the shoot in tears, with host Sam Armytage appearing from the bushes to console her. It was a tough watch.

Sam consoles Shamse. Image: Nine Network

The beauty of The Golden Bachelor lies not in its fairy-tale premise, but in its unflinching portrayal of love after loss.

These women aren't looking for their happily ever after — they're courageously opening their hearts again, despite knowing exactly how much it can hurt. And how badly it can go wrong.

Watching Shamse navigate her grief whilst trying to find love again reminded me that vulnerability doesn't diminish with age. If anything, it becomes more profound.

These women have everything to lose and everything to gain, and they're doing it all on national television.

I'm not sure what's coming for Shamse and the other women still on the show, but I'll be watching – respectfully, and with deep admiration for their bravery.

Feature image: Nine Network.