There are two types of parents - carpenters and gardeners.

A new book on parenting called The Gardener and the Carpenter by psychologist Alison Gopnik says that modern parents fit into one of two categories when it comes to how they raise their children; carpenters or gardeners. And apparently we all should aim to be green thumbs.

Gopnik used a study conducted in 2011 as the basis for her book. The study focused on preschool aged children, which researchers separated into two groups. All children were given a toy made of plastic tubes, each with a different function- one squeaked, one was illuminated, one played music and one had a mirror hidden inside.

Mia admits she may be a gardener on the latest ep of Out Loud….

With one group of the children an adult entered the room and ‘accidentally’ bumped into the table which held the toy, therefore making the ‘squeak’ noise. With the other group the adult was more deliberate in showing the toy to the children and explaining how it worked.

What researchers found was that in the group of children who were ‘accidentally’ shown the toy, play was more free and random. The children all discovered for themselves how the tubes lit up, played music and had hidden features.

The other group however, comprising of children who were shown the toy, played in a much more limited way with the item. They ‘beeped’ the toy as they were shown over and over but never took the steps to discover other elements of the plastic tubing.

Letting kids use toys in their own way has distinct advantages. Image: istock

For Gopnik the study was important for how we parent our children and resulted in her claiming that modern parents we fit into one of two groups.

She says that parents actually hinder their child's natural development by showing them how toys work and claims instead that kids excel far more when they are left to explore freely for themselves. "Our job is not to shape our children's minds," she says. "It's to let those minds explore all the possibilities that the world allows."

For Gopnik, carpenter parents are those who have an end goal, who chisel away at something in order to produce a certain kind of adult. A carpenter parent believes they can shape their child's mind and lead them on a path of their choosing.

Gardener parenting, on other hand, is a more desirable parenting style. A gardener does not believe they alone are responsible for how their child will turn out. They tend to the crop, giving it the best conditions possible to thrive.

Gopnik says that a gardener accepts that plans may not always be successful but as a parent we should try and give our children a protected environment in which they can develop for themselves

"The poppy comes up neon orange instead of pale pink...black spot and rust and aphids can never be defeated," she says. Parents roles should be one of nurture, accepting stumbling blocks along the way to allow their child's mind to expand in it's own way, in it's own time.

In learning, this means that kids should be allowed to conduct their own tests and do their own experiments rather than just accept the science they are being told. They should explore toys in their own way rather than being shown how they are supposed to work.

Gopnik argues that our education system does not favour this model of learning and claims that if children "don't fit the demands of school they are treated as if they were ill or defective or disabled."

Gopnik is not the first expert to advocate for parents to reduce their involvement in their children's learning environment with others. She praises a childhood which allows for playful learning rather than parent led education.

But Gopnik's theory is a welcome change for many parents who feel their kids should be allowed to be kids and explore the world in their own time and through their own eyes rather than being shown how things work, what to do, how to play with certain toys.