By ROSIE WATERLAND
Oh my glob, you guys. THREE FREAKING EPISODES TO GO.
And of course, because we’ve been waiting for it for so long, the editors have chosen to open tonight’s ep with a Bachie-Thinking SUPERCUT. He’s running and thinking. He’s swimming and thinking. He’s shirtless and thinking. He’s Bachie. And he’s thinking:
It’s like Sandra Sully has been saving that just for me. Love you, Sandra. Let’s do lunch. And please let Osher out of the basement once in a while – his hair needs the Vitamin D to stay strong.
Well, it’s Home Town Date-Night tonight and WE ARE NOT MESSING AROUND, PEOPLE. Things kick off immediately with Lipstick-then-not-lipstick Louise.
LOUISE’S HOME TOWN DATE: PICTURESQUE THREDBO.
Bachie meets Louise in her home town of Thredbo. Of course she looks like Malibu Stacey: The Snow Bunny Edition. Lots of frolicking in the snow ensues/making snow-angels/I’ve missed you so much/let’s not mention my other girlfriends/isn’t the snow beautiful etc etc etc.
TIME TO MEET THE FAM:
After sufficient snow-frolicking levels have been reached, they head off to Louise’s family home to meet her parents and brothers. And – Woah. Hold up. Louise is LOADED. Check out that freaking snow mansion. She could probably just buy The Bachelor and end this whole thing right now.