7 moments from Stormi's second birthday party that will haunt us until our dying days.

While we were busy deciding what to watch on Stan this weekend, and if it was acceptable to order UberEats for dinner… again, two-year-old Stormi Webster enjoyed a birthday party more extravagant than all of ours put together.

We thought Stormi’s first birthday was wild enough, but ‘Stormi World’ was back for a second year and we simply must talk about it.

We’re pretty sure two-year-olds would be happy with fairy bread and a bouncy castle, but we shouldn’t be surprised the daughter of reality star and beauty mogul Kylie Jenner and rapper Travis Scott had an actual theme park made for her birthday (for the second year running).

Kylie, Travis and guests sing Happy Birthday to Stormi. Post continues below video.

It definitely would’ve cost more money than we’ve all earned, collectively, in our lives but for some reason we can’t help but find the whole thing a bit… scary.

First of all, to enter the party, guests needed to enter through a ginormous Stormi head. It’s a nod to Scott’s Astroworld album cover, but that doesn’t make it any less bonkers.

Behold:

Then they walked through some kind of enchanted forest tunnel thing and grabbed a map - yeah, this party was so big it needed a map - and wandered around three different 'worlds': Stormi World, Trolls World and Frozen World.

I mean, we struggle to pay our rent but okay.

Here are the rest of the over-the-top, bizarre and in some cases... terrifying details below. Proceed with caution.

1. There was a Stormi mascot and that's really not okay.

When I was a two-year-old, I was petrified of humans dressed as the Bananas in Pyjamas at my local mall. I don't remember because I was TWO, but my mum says I had a full blown meltdown and screamed so loud we had to leave. And you're expecting me to believe Stormi didn't have nightmares about someone dressed as a giant... her?

Not buying it.

2. Not actually sure what this is but okay.

 

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A post shared by Kylie Jenner News (@kyliesnapchat) on Feb 1, 2020 at 4:46pm PST

That spider contraption is looks like it's straight out of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets and we don't like it. It was also replicated as a birthday cake which drastically lowered our desire to eat it.

Then there's the Stormi slide, which is still a little bit scary but also looks fun. 6/10, would slide at least once.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

3. Stormi... everything.

Absolutely everything at the party was personalised with Stormi stickers because nothing says 'Happy Birthday' like rubbish bins with your name on it.

There was also a S-shaped ball pit, a station to build your own teddy bears (which wear Stormi World t-shirts ofc), and a claw machine that holds, well, these:

Is it unnecessary? Yes. Do we still want a Stormi-branded cushion? Mmhm.

4. If you don't win anything from the claw machine, you can just pretend you're in it with this photo booth.

If you're no good at the definitely-not-rigged arcade game, never fear... you just need to visit the Stormi World photo booth, smile for a photo that makes it look like you're in the game, then make off with one of the bigger Stormi cushions.

5. Small things are terrifying when they're big. Fact.

Small trolls = cute.

Large trolls = the stuff of nightmares.

The above images looks like a horror film, yes, but as I flicked through Kylie's Instagram stories I couldn't help but feel grateful there was no giant Olaf.

Until there was.

AHHHHHHH.

6. A merch store. Because $$$.

Stormi's mum is a billionaire, and you really think they're going to miss an opportunity to make some more coin? Nah.

7. Travis Scott's hoodie.

 

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A post shared by Kylie Jenner News (@kyliesnapchat) on Feb 2, 2020 at 11:20am PST

Stormi's party had a claw machine full of Stormi's face pillows. And Travis wore a hoodie with a claw machine/Stormi face pillow design. It's so meta it hurts.

While this is undoubtedly... OTT and mildly majorly scary, the most important thing is that Stormi had a good time, right?

And since she's two and unlikely to remember that time her parents hired people to make a giant model of her head, ushered people through its mouth and into a fluro theme park, we can only be thankful that there's hours worth of Instagram stories to remind her of it all once she's older.

Happy Birthday, Stormi.

Feature image: Instagram/@kyliejenner.