Steve Biddulph on why boys fall into the "manosphere" and what we can do to stop it.

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The term "manosphere" might sound like something from a sci-fi movie, but it's very real, and it's capturing the attention of young men and teenage boys across the world at rapid rates.

The term covers the loosely connected network of websites, blogs, online forums, and social media communities promoting specific ideas about (toxic) masculinity, often with anti-feminist and misogynistic beliefs woven throughout.

Within this digital ecosystem, you'll find various groups like men's rights activists (MRAs) and incels (involuntary celibates), all sharing a common thread: the belief that modern society has tilted too far in favour of women.

Watch: The Parenting Out Loud hosts talk about how we can raise boys to become good men. Post continues below.

The Netflix series Adolescence earlier this year thrust this world into the spotlight, sparking conversations about toxic masculinity and its online breeding grounds.

Meanwhile, controversial figures like Andrew Tate have turned spreading these messages into an art form, using viral content and social media savvy to reach millions of followers.

The numbers are sobering. Research shows young men are consuming this extremist content at alarming rates, leaving many parents wondering how to navigate this new reality.

I reached out to Steve Biddulph, the acclaimed parenting expert behind Raising Boys and The New Manhood for his insights on why this phenomenon is exploding and what we can actually do about it.

Why boys are vulnerable.

"Teenage boys crave connection, and purpose, and belonging. They want to be heroes," Biddulph told Mamamia.

"So they bring these needs to the artificial and booby-trapped world of the internet."

It's a perfect storm. Boys today are more isolated than ever before.

"A third of young men after leaving school have no social contact at all in the average week, in the real world, outside their home," he explained.

"Boys without father involvement, caring teachers, uncles, or any kind of community, such as what churches and sports clubs used to offer, scouting, those kinds of things, where you could meet girls in relaxed settings, learn to chat and share, be friendly, banter, all the skills of being comfortable and safe to be yourself. To figure out your values."

"Today's boys often have none of that," he explained.

How the manosphere hooks them.

"The online influencers of the manosphere start with innocent and quite positive messages: get fit, work hard, clean your room," Biddulph said.

"And then they slide into money is everything, aim to get rich. (And they offer pyramid money schemes to get new followers, join as subscribers, be a monthly member for the real inside story)."

"Andrew Tate was earning four million dollars a month from such schemes. He got rich, it's doubtful any of his young male followers did," Biddulph shared.

But the real damage comes with the messaging that follows.

"The poison in the message is that money will get you respect, and women, and you will feel important," he said.

"Combined with the pornographic depiction of women, it creates a real disrespect and coldness in gender relations and that it's all about money and control."

The message young boys are lead to believe? "That women want to exploit you and give you nothing back. And soon the message is sheer misogyny. Women are inferior; you have to control them."

Listen: The manosphere explored on Parenting Out Loud. Post continues below.

The critical windows.

Biddulph identifies key developmental stages where intervention matters most.

"At the age of six, there's a thing that happens in boys. It's like they suddenly notice that they're male," he said.

"They're holding on to mum's hand. They still really want mum, but they're looking at dad, or they're looking at their uncle or their granddad or whoever it is. At six, you are like God to your son. He thinks you are amazing. And so, if you want him to have your values and have the qualities that you want him to have, be around and hang out."

This is where modern parenting often falls short.

"We went so badly wrong in the modern world, because we sent everyone off to work. In an agricultural society, a hunter-gatherer society, boys were around men all day, every day, so it was different. They were soaking in how to be a man."

Then comes the teenage years.

"At 14, what happens is, they don't even want to talk to their dad either. A 14-year-old boy will argue with a road sign. They have this very important and natural thing to explode out into the world."

This is when boys need more than just their parents.

"From 14, no dad can be all that his boy needs. What you have to do is you want to have a really broad palette of masculinity around him," Biddulph said.

"When he's getting to 13 or 14, he can feel manhood coming at him like a train... But he doesn't have the software. He hasn't had a chance to download 'how to be a man'."

What parents can do.

"The most important thing is to believe in our boys, that their motives are good to begin with, but can be hijacked or twisted by exposure to the poisons that abound in our world and especially on the internet," Biddulph said.

"To help our boys - discuss all of this, look at the messaging, ask about what motivates the influencers, and point out the scams.

"But above all, make their real-world life richer and full of caring adults who can reflect and bring out their better selves. So they have better role models and friends than the internet clown show.

"If dads and sons go away with other dads and their sons on a camping trip, what you'll find is your boy ends up talking to one of the other dads for hours about model airplanes or fishing, and it's starting to cross-fertilise."

His final advice is simple but profound: "Invest in parenthood, spend a lot of time with your kids, and get over the nervousness around your children, and hang out with them a lot and find your way with that. And show them how to be comfortable in their own skin by being comfortable in your own."

Feature Image: Made with AI / labs. google fx

You can find Steve Biddulph's books here and join his Facebook community here.