'A message to the mums who send their kids to childcare for "me time".'

Some mums drop their kids at childcare then come home to binge-watch Gilmore Girls.

It’s me. I’m ‘some mums’ today, and at the risk of being crucified by the internet, I’m going to go ahead and say I’m not feeling particularly guilty about it either.  

Mums try so damn hard to prove they’re a ‘good mum’ by working non-stop around the clock without taking a break, because otherwise they might be considered lazy. A bad mum.

Watch: Be a Good Mum. Post continues below.

I hate having to admit it, but pre-kids me was guilty of this judgment, too. I wondered how people could justify sending their kids to daycare if they weren’t working.

I mean what - did they just come home and sit on their a**e for the entire day?

YES! Well, sometimes yes, sometimes no, but I get it now and I’m SO sorry I ever judged a mum for needing a break. 

Mums need breaks from the constant noises penetrating their minds. The headache-inducing screams as we try to prepare lunches while simultaneously breaking up a fight over the blue plate, or trying to brush our teeth as a toddler wails at our feet because both of their legs are in the one leg hole of their pants and they need help. 

Those never-ending stories, tantrums, and questions we try to navigate with love while also wishing for the sweet sound of silence. 

Side Note: Listen to this Glorious Mess, where we chat about how to deal with separation anxiety. Post continues below.

A break to shower without grubby hands smearing over the shower door because the kids have decided that they’re suddenly STARVING and need you to make them some food - IMMEDIATELY. 

Trying to ignore them and finish the shower feels like nothing less than anxiety in the making because it turns out they’ve opened the gates to hell and the house is igniting in a fire of rage. Showering when they’re asleep or your partner is home starts to feel like the only option, but it's not always possible. 

A break to feel like you. To make uninterrupted phone calls, watch TV shows that don’t make your brain cells cry, or eat food you don’t need to share or label as ‘too spicy for you’. 

Anything to remind you that you’re a person as much as a mother, because sometimes that ‘you’ gets buried under the life you’re still attempting to master.

Some self-care, some basic necessities - some, none, all, whatever you choose to do. I get it. Breaks are a non-negotiable. 

My kind of break. Image: Supplied. 

Because we get enough of this. Image: Supplied. 

Sometimes a break ends up so overdue that a single day won’t even cut it. You’re so worn down that by the time you’re back to your mothering duties, your soul is still exhaustedly cranky and crying out for you to finish refilling your bucket because all you’ve managed to do in that day is throw some tape over the gaping holes of self-neglect to help pull yourself through another week.  

So, f*** it. Today I’m sitting here on my a**e watching tv while the kids are at daycare because I’m a GOOD MUM who’s started to realise weekly breaks make the world of difference to my mental capacity as a mother.

I’m a good mum who’s spent the year working her butt off to keep the kids happy through major bushfires, two lockdowns, an interstate move, a hotel quarantine, and settling into our new home before my husband gets sent away in two weeks time because you know, #defencelife.

I’m human and I deserve this day. And so do you.

Katie Hicks is a mum of three girls. A part time hairdresser, she spends her time blogging about her days of chaos over at Living My Family Life.

Feature Image: Supplied.

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