Small sunnies suck: why I’ll keep wearing my big shades even if they make me uncool.

I’m the first to admit I love a trend. Clothes and beauty products excite me and I don’t think that means I’m not an intelligent woman – the two aren’t mutually exclusive.

I was all over the silk scarf trend like a rash. I lived in mom jeans for about a year despite my child-free status. And I am very, very excited that berets are gonna be big this winter.

But one trend I cannot, WILL NOT get behind, is small sunglasses. You know, like the ones Keanu Reeves wore when he played Neo in The Matrix. The tiny frames the Kardashians have been wearing the past few months. The sunnies that even quirky style queen Leandra Medine can’t quite pull off.

IMPORTANT QUESTION THAT NO ONE ANSWERED! Do I look like if the Matrix and The Bird Cage were the same movie?

A post shared by Leandra (Medine) Cohen (@leandramcohen) on Feb 11, 2018 at 8:43am PST

Firstly, they look good on approximately no one. Everyone looks like they’re going to throwback dress up party or that they forgot their normal sunnies and had to stop in at a servo for an emergency pair.

Secondly, and also very, very importantly, they practically DEFEAT THE PURPOSE OF WEARING SUNGLASSES IN THE FIRST PLACE.

I had to shout that bit because the whole trend is borderline absurd. Yes, I know many trends don’t serve a purpose (I’m looking at you, earrings) but your eye health is no joke.

“The ’90s inspired ‘microshades’ trend, which made an impact at London and Paris Fashion Weeks recently, aren’t the ideal style to protect your eyes from harmful UV rays,” the Good Vision For Life blog warned.

“We welcome sunglasses being made the ‘must have accessory’, but they must also protect your eyes rather than just your image.”

“Choosing sunglasses that don’t protect from side and reflected UV is a common mistake. Light entering the eyes from the side of the head can cause pterygium – a wing of fleshy tissue to grow over the surface of the eye which in turn can cause redness, irritation and affect vision, along with the eyes’ cosmetic appearance.”

Not pretty.

LISTEN: Ever wondered how much a model gets paid? Chelsea Bonner has the answers. Post continues after audio. 

Eyeballs specifically aside, pigmentation and wrinkles around the eyes are a thing. A thing you might be fine with, and that’s cool, but if you’re like me and spend a decent amount of your monthly pay on fancy eye creams then wearing these stupid little shades will render said expensive eye cream redundant.

Also, big sunglasses hide hangovers, sleepless nights (be it from babies or burning the proverbial candle) and in my not-so-special opinion, just look heaps better.

Case in point, my new babies I got just this week:

Prive Revaux The Celebrity Sunglasses, $39.95

...and because this is just one writer's opinion and you might be into small sunglasses (or retro sunglasses, or aviator sunglasses) we've got a whole bunch of all different styles at heavily reduced prices over at Mamamia Shopping. Take a look!