'I thought I'd found someone special. Instead, I was scammed out of thousands.'

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After a long separation, Sarah decided to dip her toe back into the dating world, and like most people these days, she signed up for online dating.

Over the following nine months, she went on a few dates. The men were nice and friendly, but they weren't the right ones for her.

"I wasn't looking for 'quick and flick'. I wanted a connection. Something that would turn into a longer-term relationship was probably my ideal, though I didn't know if I would find it here," shared Sarah.

She tried a few different sites — some great, some not so great — and around nine months after she first signed up, she met Don.

He was attractive, well-presented and a brilliant conversationalist. They quickly moved from the app to text and eventually started talking on the phone.

"I believe connection makes the world go round so for me, I felt connection. It wasn't love but certainly was a connection. This happened through text, phone calls, the language used, the pictures shared, the stories told. That's how you build connection and this person did this well. Very well."

After a few weeks, Don started dropping hints about needing to borrow money. Angry, Sarah took him to task.

"I challenged him the first time he asked and told him never to do it again."

Over time, though, their 'relationship' developed and Sarah believed she could trust Don.

"He offered up front all the evidence I needed: lots of copies of documents, a copy of his passport and a story that made sense — stories of his daughter and her name.

"He then began to learn my spending patterns and would seek more money on those days."

Sarah's family were worried and warned her to back away, but like most people in committed relationships, Sarah believed Don would return the money she lent him.

"I didn't believe the people who were supporting me. No, it can't be. The money is coming back. I was hooked into the novel — the one where I was the main character."

By the time Sarah accepted that the man she felt so connected to didn't exist, she had lost tens of thousands of dollars.

Sarah had always known about scammers but she never believed it could happen to her.

"Not in a million years," she said.

"Scammers, as we are told, come from a 'let's invest in this', a fake text, a fake link. This was not like that; this was someone tapping into my caring personality when I was seeking connection.

"I was sitting in a vulnerable position and I didn't know where to turn."

Sarah isn't alone. Bankwest's 2024 Safe and Savvy Report revealed scam cases increased by almost 50 per cent over the past financial year.

"Relationship scams involve the grooming of victims — sometimes over long periods of time — to gain trust, then financial gain under the guise of health issues, family problems, travel expenses or other personal issues," said Philippa Costanzo, General Manager — Payments, Fraud and Scams at Bankwest.

Scammers will often tailor their methods based on their target, especially based on demographics. 

"Romance scammers may hide behind fake online profiles, which are designed to grab your attention and they often gain your trust over time."

Scamming has become so prolific that it has developed into a media genre of its own, with countless movies and television shows — many based on true stories — demonstrating the devastating impacts of scams and how literally anyone can be a target.

Dirty John, You and the Australian-made series Fake all demonstrate how the best of us can become victims.

"Scams and fraud can happen to anyone at any time, which is why the best defence is to stay informed and vigilant of the latest threats, particularly as scammers become increasingly more sophisticated," said Philippa.

"They'll usually ask for financial assistance or gifts and can be very convincing. It can be easy to believe they're genuine because they've taken a long time to build a relationship with you."

Philippa said signs to look out for include fast and intense declarations of love, a preference to take the communication off an official dating platform to instant messaging and a change from affection to desperation or threats.

There is a long road to travel to ensure that all Australians are educated and aware of the latest scams and that people of all ages know how to protect themselves against scammers and their latest tricks.

Bankwest has a security hub with information on some ways you may be able to better protect yourself against scams. The recently launched NameCheck feature in the Bankwest app allows customers to cross-reference names and account numbers to double check payment details, and their Look Who's Charging feature helps identify unknown charges.

The app also enables users to temporarily lock their card as soon as they notice any suspicious activity.

"Bankwest has released its new Check-it technology into the Bankwest app, which generates in-app digital alerts that aim to empower customers to check potentially unusual transactions and banking activity," said Philippa.

Check-it alerts customers to potential unusual activity from ATM use and POS purchases, or during first-time card use and digital wallet set-ups, helping customers to identify signs of potential fraudulent activity.

"Scammers are also constantly evolving their methods to overcome security measures that are put in place, which is why one of the best steps of defence are to remove the stigma around talking about scams."

The source of this article is known to Mamamia, but her identity has been omitted for privacy reasons.

Explore the Bankwest Security Hub to find out the latest scam and fraud information, and how Bankwest can help keep you protected.

Feature Image: Getty.

The information contained in this publication is of a general nature and is not intended to be nor should it be considered as professional advice. Bankwest, a division of Commonwealth Bank of Australia ABN 48 123 123 124 AFSL/Australian credit licence 234945.