'I'm a women's performance coach. Here are 7 questions to ask yourself if you're dreading work.'

It's about 4pm on a Sunday afternoon and it begins.

The sinking feeling in your stomach. The mental fog. That low-level dread humming in the background.

You've had a decent weekend. Maybe even a great festive break where work barely crossed your mind.

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But suddenly you're thinking about the emails waiting in your inbox, the thing you didn't finish on Friday, and the ever-growing to-do list that awaits your return to work.

And then, because you're a woman, the other list kicks in too.

Back to school shopping. Pay the swimming fees. Buy milk. Organise life.

Before you know it, you're anxious, distracted and mentally bargaining with yourself.

"Maybe I'll just call in sick tomorrow."

"Maybe I just need another week off…"

Hello, Sunday night ick. And for some, it's not just Sundays… it's many days.

The good news is you're not alone. This feeling shows up for even the most capable, high-performing women. And as a leadership and performance coach for women, this is one of the most common conversations I have in January.

But just because it's common doesn't mean it should be ignored.

That uneasy feeling about work doesn't mean you should panic, quit or overhaul your life overnight. But it does signal that there's something worth paying attention to, IF you listen to yourself.

Think of it as internal feedback. And while feedback can be pretty annoying, it's also incredibly useful if you're willing to listen and use this feedback in a productive way.

Often, that ick is pointing to misalignment. Maybe the values no longer match. Maybe your role isn't playing to your strengths. Maybe you're exhausted from constantly being the one who adapts, copes and holds everything together.

High-functioning women are very good (like Ninja level good) at pushing through misalignment.

We're resilient, responsible and capable. But there comes a point where pushing through stops being admirable and starts being expensive — especially for your health.

Instead of rushing to conclusions, I encourage my clients to slow down and ask better questions. Here are the seven questions I come back to again and again when someone tells me they're dreading work.

1. What does this job actually give me?

Before you focus on what's wrong, acknowledge what's right. Stability, flexibility, friendships, intellectual challenge or a sense of contribution.

When dread kicks in, it's easy to only see the negatives. Balanced decisions require the full picture.

2. What exactly am I dreading and when does it show up?

Is it the job, or is it one meeting, one project or one relationship at work?

Getting specific reduces overwhelm and helps you understand what might actually need to change.

3. Is this a rough patch or a recurring pattern?

Post-holiday stress and fatigue are real. Research published in Psychology Today shows that returning to high-demand environments places strain on our cognitive and emotional resources.

But if this feeling has been hanging around for months, that's information worth taking seriously.

4. Am I exhausted, or am I unfulfilled?

These two feel similar, but they're not the same. Making the distinction is incredibly powerful.

Exhaustion points to burnout and unsustainable workload. Unfulfillment points to a lack of meaning, growth or challenge. The solutions are very different.

5. What have I been tolerating that no longer feels sustainable?

This is often where things get honest. A dynamic, an expectation, a pace of work or an environment you've quietly adapted to, even though it no longer serves you.

6. If nothing changed this year, how would that honestly feel?

No fixing. No judging. Just imagine yourself a year from now in the same role, with the same patterns. What comes up?

7. If I could wave a magic wand, what kind of work would I want to be doing?

This isn't about practicality, yet. It's about giving yourself permission to dream. Don't edit yourself or talk yourself out of ideas, rather imagine what could be possible!

What tends to come up for women is a realisation that they've been prioritising security, stability and 'not rocking the boat', while quietly sidelining what they actually want and ignoring their inner voice.

Many have been so focused on coping well that they haven't stopped to ask whether the situation is still right. Pausing and reflecting can be your best approach here.

Here's the reassuring part. You don't have to decide everything right now. You don't need to quit your job tomorrow or have a five-year plan mapped out by the end of January.

Sometimes, the next step is smaller and more intentional. Redesigning parts of your role. Setting clearer boundaries. Creating more space for meaningful work. Exploring a side project. Or calmly planning a longer-term exit rather than staying stuck.

Work dread isn't something to push through or explain away. It's a signal, and it's worth acknowledging it and making a plan.

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You don't have to act on it immediately, and you don't have to burn everything down. But you do owe it some curiosity.

Because the goal isn't to tolerate your working life better in 2026. It's to build one that actually sustains you.

Feature image: Supplied.