Reese Witherspoon believed the "awful things" her abuser told her. One moment changed everything.

The decision to leave an abusive partner is "fraught with self-doubt", actress and producer Reese Witherspoon told Oprah Winfrey in 2018.

The self-doubt is made worse, the mother-of-three continued, “if someone damages your self-esteem”.

“There’s a range of abuse, there’s verbal and psychological abuse, as well as physical, that can be completely detrimental to your self-worth, your self-esteem and your progress in life.”

She was speaking from experience.

When asked by Winfrey, during a Super Soul Conversations video what was the most difficult decision she’d ever had to make to fulfil her "destiny", Witherspoon replied, "For me, it was leaving an abusive relationship".

And now, in a recent interview on The New York Times' The Interview podcast, Witherspoon has opened up further about the lasting impact of that relationship and her journey to recovery.

"I was very good at being a professional and showing up and doing the right thing, but I wasn't emotionally mature when I was young," she reflected to host Lulu Garcia-Navarro.

"You get into relationships that don't work for you, and sometimes you don't even see the dynamics that are happening."

She also opened up about how an abusive relationship left her questioning her own worth and identity.

"It took me a while to reconstitute myself," the 49-year-old continued. "My spirit had been diminished because I thought all those awful things that person said about me were true. I had to rewire my brain."

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It was a long time ago and Witherspoon didn't name her abuser but she said the experience changed her on a "cellular level".

"I was a different person. It changed me at a cellular level, the fact I stood up for myself," she said.

"I didn't have self-esteem, I'm a different person now. It's part of the reason why I can stand up now and say 'yes, I am ambitious' because someone tried to take that from me."

The Big Little Lies producer said the abuse was verbal and emotional, and that there was one instance in which she knew she had to leave.

"A line was drawn in the sand, and it got crossed, and my brain just switched. I couldn't go any further. I was really young, and it was profound."

Reflecting on her growth, Witherspoon — who shares daughter Ava, 26, and son Deacon, 21, with ex-husband Ryan Phillippe as well as son Tennessee, 13, with ex-husband Jim Toth — acknowledged the long journey to becoming who she is today.

"It took me a long time to be this woman that I am now," she explained. "It's very hard to be a public figure."

She also expressed empathy for others navigating similar challenges in the spotlight.

"I have a lot of compassion for people who live public lives and maintain privacy. It's nearly impossible at this point with everybody dehumanising you in a certain way, taking pictures of you like you're an animal in the zoo instead of a person with their children or having a private moment."

Since then, she has realised how common abusive relationships are. "I am hard pressed to find any group of women who haven't had an experience," she said.

Over the years, Witherspoon has had several high profile relationships, most notably being her two ex-husbands, Ryan Phillippe and Jim Toth.

Witherspoon and Phillippe met at the actress' 21st birthday party in 1997.

"I don't know what came over me — maybe the seven Midori sours — but I told him, 'I think you're my birthday present,'" she told Jane Magazine in 1998.

"He thought it was so flattering, and now that I think about it… how embarrassing!"

Young and in love, their relationship moved quickly and they ended up becoming engaged one year after they met.

But before they tied the knot, Witherspoon became pregnant with their first child, daughter Ava.

In 1999, three months after the premiere of cult classic Cruel Intentions, the couple married in an intimate ceremony in Charleston, South Carolina while Witherspoon was six months pregnant.

Three months later she gave birth to Ava and four more years after that they welcomed their son, Deacon.

Then, after seven years of marriage, the pair announced they were separating in 2006.

Nine years later, Phillippe told Larry King that their age was a big factor behind their divorce.

"I think more of the problem was age. When we got together we were so young," he said. "I think it can create issues with two people in this industry because there's so much noise that goes along with it."

Witherspoon echoed the same message in 2017 during an appearance on ITV's Lorraine.

"I got married when I was 23 and I had two kids by the time I was 27. So I don't know, you know, sometimes it's good to know yourself," she said.

"I would never change anything," she continued, explaining, "I've said to my daughter, I think, you know, [at] 25, you start to know yourself a little bit better."

Witherspoon and Phillippe have continued to co-parent together over the years. In 2022, they celebrated their son Deacon's high school graduation together.

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After separating from Phillippe, Witherspoon began dating her Rendition co-star, Jake Gyllenhaal in 2007, but the couple split in 2009.

Then, in 2010, Witherspoon met Jim Toth, who became her second husband in 2011.

"It happened out of the blue," Witherspoon recalled to Elle in 2012.

"This really drunk guy was hitting on me, making such an idiot of himself, yelling at me. He was like, [slurring, scowling, pointing finger in her face] 'You don't know me.' And I was like, 'Yeah, I know. I don't know you!'"

Jim ended up stepping in and saving her from the conversation.

"Jim came over and said, 'Please excuse my friend. He's just broken up with someone.' Jim was a really good friend, pulling him out of that situation. That's just kind of who he is, a really good person," she told the publication.

Toth proposed in December 2010, and the pair ended up tying the knot in 2011 at Witherspoon's California Ranch. A year later, they welcomed their son Tennessee.

But in 2023, after 11 years of marriage, the couple announced they were divorcing.

"We have some personal news to share," they wrote in a joint statement at the time.

"It is with a great deal of care and consideration that we have made the difficult decision to divorce. We have enjoyed so many wonderful years together and are moving forward with deep love, kindness and mutual respect for everything we have created together.

"Our biggest priority is our son and our entire family as we navigate this next chapter."

Feature Image: Getty.