'A month before Christmas, a calendar invite dropped into my diary out of nowhere...'

Seven days ago, a 'catch up' slid into my diary.

I thought nothing of it, but when I walked into that meeting with my manager and saw HR sitting at the table, my heart turned into a kettlebell and hit the floor.

I knew exactly what was happening. "Thanks, but no, thanks. Give us your stuff and get out."

I was being made redundant, effective immediately.

In the past week, I have felt all the emotions. Immediately, I was in shock. This came out of nowhere, and I was completely blindsided. Then, I was angry. I was angry that this happened two days before my birthday and right before Christmas. I was angry that this happened at all, because I didn't deserve this, did I? I was depressed and I questioned my worth. I just wanted to lay in my bed and rot, but I couldn't do that, because underlying all the emotions was fear. Fear of the unknown. How am I going to support my family without a stable income in this economy? I had no option but to hustle and hustle fast.

Watch: The career versus baby dilemma. Post continues after video.

I was immediately overwhelmed by how willing to help people were. We all know how toxic social media can be, but this week I've found out how compassionate and supportive they can be too. I've been sharing my redundancy journey on TikTok, which has been cathartic, like a little diary. What I didn't expect was this level of support. People who don't know me but know my field are sending me jobs, offering to introduce me to people, or wanting to catch up to discuss opportunities over coffee.  Hot tip: If you want to network, TikTok is the place!

Never in a million years would I have thought I'd be meeting strangers from the internet for a 'networking coffee', but that's where I am. I'm meeting people and neither of us has an agenda except to meet other like-minded people and help each other out where we can.

I'm from a corporate world where people will crawl over your overworked dead body to steal your ideas and present them as their own, so this level of genuine care is a whole new world to me. But I'm so glad I'm meeting these people because these are the exact types of people I want to work with in the future.

One thing that's been very clear, is that the people reaching out and the people I'm meeting for coffee are all women.

I know I'm not alone in this 'Redundancy Class of 2024'. As every recruiter has told me, it's one of the worst job markets they've seen. Before I was made redundant, four of my friends had been in the past month. Three of those were women. And since I've been sharing my story, that seems to be the trend. It is women who are flooding my comments with similar experiences, women who couldn't get jobs after they were made redundant because they were "too expensive" and "too senior". 

What has surprised me most, is the amount of women that were either pregnant, on maternity leave, or had just returned from maternity leave when they were made redundant. We still have a way to go to close the gender gap in the workforce, but on the plus side, there are some incredibly talented women out there looking for work if you're hiring.

I have worked so hard my whole career. I've earned multiple degrees and awards, I've continued to upskill and network. When I had children, staying home with them full-time was never an option, corporate success remained the goal.

But the biggest shock outside the shock of the actual redundancy, was immediately knowing I didn't want to do 9-5 anymore. I simply couldn't. I was away from my kids 12–14 hours a day.

The time I was with them, I was constantly anxious and checking my emails. I couldn't do drop-offs or pick-ups. I would walk in at night just in time to put them to bed.  My partner was doing all the heavy lifting with the housework and life admin. You can ask any working mum, and we'll all tell you we don't know how we do it. It's simply not practical to work full-time, but also do the cleaning, cooking, laundry, weekend activities, and parties and still have a life of your own. There are simply not enough hours!

I still want to work hard, it's in my nature, I want to be successful, and I want to help people. And, of course, I want a stable income to support my family's lifestyle. But I want it to look different. I want to be able to do drop-offs and pick-ups, I want to be able to cook dinner for my family. Okay, that's a lie, I don't want to 'cook' dinner, I just want to be home for it. 

People always say that redundancy turns out to be the best thing for them. And even though I'm terrified, and I don't know what comes next, I'm backing myself.

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Feature image: Supplied.