Just take the pill or have a baby. These are the myths keeping us in pain.

Holly Kane remembers the first signs that appeared during high school. Intense, heavy periods accompanied by pain and fatigue.

As she grew up, she didn't realise it wasn't 'normal'.

"Like many women, I suppressed these feelings and tried to push through," she told Mamamia.

Watch: Three men try a period pain stimulator to see if they can handle women's pain. Post continues below.

"The turning point was when I became sexually active. The pain was excruciating, leading to an unhealthy relationship with intimacy. My Christian background at the time added another layer of complexity and shame, resulting in not being able to talk to people about it."

When Holly did seek medical attention, she was referred to a male gynaecologist, and after a quick examination, was told that "everything looked good and healthy".

Listen: In Mamamia's brand new podcast Well, co-hosts Claire Murphy and Dr Mariam discuss everything you need to know about periods and bust a few myths along the way. Post continues below.

His prescription? "Just try and relax."

"With the pain continuing to persist, I went to a specialised pelvic floor physiotherapist who identified signs of endometriosis — a disease I wasn't familiar with. After speaking to the gynaecologist within the same clinic, he recommended a diagnostic laparoscopy," she said.

Just before her surgery, Holly found out she was pregnant and had no choice but to cancel her surgery.

"About a year after my daughter was born, the symptoms came back, and the pain resumed, despite some doctors telling me that "pregnancy can heal endometriosis," she shared.

It wasn't until Holly was 25 that she received a formal diagnosis.

"I ended up having my first laparoscopy where the surgeon from a reputable women's health clinic diagnosed me with endometriosis and adenomyosis. However, she said I only had a small amount of endo. After the surgery, my cycle changed completely and I began menstruating every fortnight. I raised my concerns with the surgeon, and she assured me it was normal and to start taking the pill as well as my IUD. Despite taking her advice, my pain didn't improve, and my cycle was still all out of whack."

Post-surgery, Holly began educating herself through books and endometriosis support groups on Facebook. "I discovered that surgeons should be advanced excision specialists, which mine was not. I also discovered that there are two methods of removing endometriosis: ablation (burning the surface) and excision (cutting it out). While excision is considered the gold standard treatment, my doctor performed ablation — a procedure that cost me over $5,000."

Holly eventually found a qualified expert and shared that since then her experience has been "completely different."

"My doctor revealed that my previous surgeon likely lacked the expertise to identify all forms of the disease. He showed me images of how endometriosis can present differently from the traditional 'black dots' seen in medical journals, something many doctors don't recognise. I booked another surgery, and when he visited me afterwards, he shared that the endometriosis was "everywhere" and classified as Stage IV (four out of five stages)."

"I cried in response. It was so validating and relieving to know it wasn't all in my head."

Holly's pelvic condition impacts every aspect of her life. An 'invisible illness' that can be devastatingly life-altering but not easily seen or understood.

Welcome to the world of pelvic pain.

In a 2023 National Women's Health Survey, it was found that nearly four in five women in Australia experience painful, heavy or irregular periods, and three in four of those affected struggle with daily activities due to their symptoms.

For many, this pain isn't just 'normal period cramps' — it's a debilitating condition that feels like "barbed wires around your uterus" or "being stabbed in the side with a knife that's being twisted".

From endometriosis to adenomyosis and polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), the umbrella term 'pelvic pain' offers up a broad range of health issues — often complex and non-communicable conditions that are scattered across a wide spectrum of illnesses. While the condition varies in severity, the fact is that many people go through years — or even decades — of debilitating pain until they finally get some answers.

Yet, despite affecting millions of Australian women, pelvic pain conditions continue to be dismissed, misdiagnosed, or worse — normalised as just another part of being a woman.

It may be 2025, but there's a whole heap of common medical diagnoses you're probably more likely to miss just because you're a woman. And pelvic conditions are just the tip of the iceberg.

Then there are the myths. The myths that are keeping women in pain.

There's still a tendency for medical professionals and the public in general to dismiss or normalise symptoms such as pelvic pain and heavy menstrual bleeding as "normal" parts of menstruation. That the pain is psychological. That there's nothing that can be done. Take the pill. Just have a baby.

The result? A lost generation of women who are falling through the cracks.

Chronic pelvic pain: The invisible illness we ignore.

When it comes to pelvic pain, we often default to one explanation: endometriosis. But while endometriosis affects approximately one million Australian women, it's just one piece of a much larger puzzle.

The reality is that pelvic pain conditions exist on a spectrum, with different causes, symptoms, and treatment needs — yet they're often lumped together under one umbrella, leading to misdiagnosis and delayed treatment.

Take adenomyosis, for example. Heard of it before? Despite affecting one in five women — making it more common than endometriosis — it remains largely unknown and under-discussed.

This invisibility isn't just about a lack of awareness; it's about a systemic failure to recognise and validate women's pain.

For the uninitiated, endometriosis occurs outside the uterus, adenomyosis within the uterine wall, and PCOS primarily affects the ovaries. While for some, pelvic pain is met with classic symptoms and clear signs that lead to early detection, for many women, subtle pain and surrounding symptoms make this a condition that's all too often only diagnosed after many years of other labels (and treatments).

In Australia, it takes an average of 6.5 years just to receive an endometriosis diagnosis, with women being 50 per cent more likely than men to be dismissed when experiencing pain. When you think of just how painful this condition is — waiting almost seven years for pain relief is a long time. The symptoms of such conditions can often have a severe impact on someone's quality of life, affecting not only their physical and mental health but their relationships, too.

As Holly shared, "Living with a chronic invisible illness affects far more than just the physical symptoms — it drains your energy, weakens your immunity, gives you constant brain fog, and, in my case, affects your joints. Each day brings uncertainty. One morning I might have enough energy to function, but the next, I can barely move and all I want to do is sleep."

"As a single mum working full-time, rest isn't a luxury I can afford. I have to show up and perform at work, then ensure I meet my daughter's emotional and physical needs. People often tell me I'm strong for managing all of this. But the truth is, sometimes I don't want to be strong. Sometimes I want to collapse into a heap and have someone take care of me. I'm strong because I have to be."

"With what little energy I have going into work and motherhood, there's nothing left for anything else. My social life has dwindled — and you can forget about trying to date."

There's not a heavy physical and emotional burden, but financial too.

"It's unrelenting," shared Holly. "Between specialist appointments and surgeries every one to two years, expensive scans and blood tests, regular GP visits, pelvic floor physio, and ongoing medication costs, there's little room for the things I actually want to be spending my money on. While I'm grateful we're not dealing with the US medical system, many treatments aren't covered by Medicare, and the public waiting lists of two-plus years aren't viable for most people."

Earlier this year, a new medication was approved for the treatment of endometriosis symptoms — the first in 13 years. A once-daily tablet, the medication has been approved by the Therapeutic Goods Administration (TGA) for the treatment of symptoms associated with endometriosis. It works by regulating the levels of oestrogen and progesterone in the body — the hormones that contribute to endometriosis — alleviating its symptoms.

Up until now, the only available treatment approved for endometriosis sufferers were injections or nasal sprays — with this new tablet being the first oral form.

Mamamia spoke with Associate Professor Gino Pecoraro, President of the National Association of Specialist Obstetricians & Gynaecologists (NASOG), who said while things are slowly improving, there's still a long way to go.

"Although the federal government has spent money on raising awareness of female pelvic pain and endo, there hasn't been any extra money to fund laparoscopy for diagnosis and treatment in either the public or private sectors," he shared.

"Public hospital waiting lists are longer, not shorter (the average wait time in my state is over 12 months) and they haven't fixed the Medicare rebates or forced the health funds to pay the actual costs of surgery in the private sector. So, out-of-pocket costs are usually thousands of dollars, even after paying for private health insurance."

"A few funded clinics in each state haven't really touched the large burden of pelvis pain in Australia and regional women continue to find accessing surgeons, physios, scans and medication more difficult than city women, in addition, of course, to the costs involved."

Breaking down the myths.

Outside the lack of funding, there's also a significant shortage of education about these conditions. The result? A string of harmful myths that can essentially delay diagnosis, prevent proper treatment, and negatively impact patients' quality of life.

To start with, many people believe that severe pelvic pain, especially during menstruation, is normal. Because that's what they've been told since, forever. Not only does this lead to the trivialisation of symptoms and delayed diagnosis of conditions, but when pain is normalised, individuals may not seek medical attention, allowing underlying conditions to progress untreated.

As Lara Birden, naturopathic doctor and author of Period Repair Manual, told us, the long-standing assumption that period pain is normal and should just be "put up with" is not only wrong, but it's also dangerous.

"Of course, period pain is common, but through my lens as a naturopath, any amount of period pain is not technically normal — and severe period pain is certainly not. My experience with thousands of patients has taught me that for many women, it's possible to achieve symptom-less, pain-free periods."

"The normalisation of women's pain has meant that research into endometriosis and adenomyosis has not received as much funding or attention as other conditions of similar prevalence."

"With endometriosis, there's also the issue of surgical bias — for nearly a century, the condition has been framed almost exclusively as a disease of lesions, while pain mechanisms, immune dysfunction, and neural hypersensitivity have been overlooked."

Outside of costly surgery and lengthy waitlists, the medical advice most women are given? "Just take the pill."

As Briden shared, "Hormonal birth control can sometimes reduce symptoms, but not always. Furthermore, it doesn't address the underlying neural and immune dysfunction of endometriosis or adenomyosis."

Contrary to what you might think, pelvic health conditions can also affect women of all ages. For instance, interstitial cystitis/bladder pain syndrome (IC/BPS) is more common after 40 years of age, but it can occur earlier. This myth may cause younger women to dismiss their symptoms, leading to delayed diagnosis and treatment.

As actress and ambassador of Endometriosis Australia, Sophie Dillman said that growing up she simply thought pain was 'normal' and just part and parcel of being a woman.

"I distinctly remember my first period being horrific. I vomited and the cramps were so bad I had to stay home from school. Since then, my periods have been heavy, irregular and so painful I couldn't concentrate. I remember my mother and grandmother saying this is just what women have to put up with. Their pain was bad, so there wasn't anything wrong with me — I just had to deal with it."

"I started researching endometriosis when I heard about it whilst studying for my nursing degree. I was certain I had the disease and forced my gynaecologist to operate (which is the only reliable diagnostic tool we currently have). Even in the recovery room, the doctor came to see me and said there was no evidence of endometriosis, just old scar tissue from having my appendix out (at 10 years old)."

"I pushed back and insisted she test the tissue and only after an argument did she agree — and it was confirmed that I had endometriosis. At 21 years old, I was fighting a female gynaecological professor to advocate for me. The same thing happened after my second surgery with a different doctor. She collected scar tissue that she also believed to be from a previous surgery and said I had been misdiagnosed with endometriosis. I insisted (somewhat aggressively as I was still using heavy pain medication) that the tissue needed to be tested — once again the diagnosis was confirmed. It's exhausting. Even after being diagnosed, women have to defend themselves."

The most dangerous of myths? Women are still being told that to cure their pelvic condition, they need to "just have a baby."

Take, for example, Indi Woollard. At age 11, Indi was in debilitating pain. A doctor told her the only way to fix it was to get pregnant.

"I was 11 and at the GP with my mum. I had been off school a lot, screaming and crying from the pain. This GP told me that the only way to get rid of the pain was to have a baby," Indi recounted. "I felt so incredibly lost and devastated. I wasn't even a teenager yet, there was no way I would be having a baby. And to think I had to wait 10 or 20 years from that point to have a 'solution' to the pain, it was so unhelpful."

Of course, pregnancy doesn't 'cure' endometriosis. "Pregnancy can temporarily suppress symptoms, but they can return after delivery," said Briden. "In some cases, pain can even be worse after delivery as a result of nerve sensitisation or pelvic floor problems," she explained.

"The pregnancy myth pressures women into having children for the wrong reasons and potentially deprives them of the opportunity to receive appropriate immune and nervous system treatments. No one should be told to have a baby as a medical solution to pain."

Dr Pecoraro added, "Unfortunately, endo is now one, if not the most common, reason for young women needing help to get pregnant. It can also be associated with increased rates of miscarriage (as can adenomyosis)."

As Sophie told us, the constant echo of misinformation surrounding her condition never stops.

"If I get told to drink one more f**king herb juice I may scream. I've also been told to have a baby, cut alcohol, soy, dairy, sugar, high-intensity exercise, low-intensity exercise and fast for three months straight."

"A psychic told me a voice from above insisted I give up red meat and practice two hours of yoga every day. There is also something about eating only hot foods cooked over an open fire that apparently is magic for your womb? I do appreciate that people are trying to be helpful, but trust me when I say those of us who have suffered this long have tried EVERYTHING and telling us to just have a baby (which can be difficult to do with endometriosis) is not what we need to hear."

So, where do we go from here?

According to experts, what's needed is a complete overhaul of how we approach women's pelvic health. This includes more research into non-invasive diagnostic tools, better education for healthcare providers, the development of effective drug therapies and greater public awareness about what constitutes 'normal' versus concerning symptoms.

Currently, the diagnosis of pelvic conditions such as endometriosis is significantly increasing. Whether this is a true increase in the incidence of the disease or because we are becoming better educated and women are becoming more empowered to access appropriate healthcare for their problems is a different story.

"Knowledge is power in health. We need to help educate women about their health and where to get the help they need," Dr Pecoraro told Mamamia. "We need to get people power to mobilise and force politicians to adequately fund healthcare and force them to give honest answers around public waiting times, costs of treatments and what is available in the two parallel systems working in Australia."

"In short, this is now a political issue as much as a health issue. We're in the year of a federal election, and it is perhaps the best time to get the attention of those who make and fund healthcare access decisions. In my opinion, we need to mount a campaign to get all sides of politics to openly declare what they will do to help the women of Australia access the health care they need and then vote accordingly."

For the one million Australian women living with these conditions, validation and proper treatment shouldn't be a luxury. If you're experiencing severe period pain that affects your daily activities, work, or school, you're not alone — and more importantly, you're not making it up.

All pain is real.

"Despite the many challenges, I'm hopeful," Briden said. "There's still a long way to go, but women are being heard more than ever before, and that alone is progress."

For Holly, her journey continues. While surgery has improved her symptoms, she's since been diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome), PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder), and chronic pelvic pain — the latter being her body's ongoing response to endometriosis.

"Don't let one doctor's dismissal make you doubt yourself — if something feels wrong, it probably is. Remember that periods shouldn't leave you bedridden, and sex shouldn't be painful. These aren't things you just have to 'put up with'. Take control of your health journey by educating yourself and building a healthcare team that supports both your physical and mental wellbeing."

Sophie added, "I do have an incredible GP who has advocated for my pain since the beginning. I feel very lucky I can go to her and not be questioned about needing pain relief or extra support. I know that is really hard to find, but don't give up looking for someone who sees you. A good doctor makes all the difference."

"Periods aren't meant to be unmanageable. If your quality of life is being impacted by anything, you deserve to work out what is going on and try to improve the situation. The more we know about our bodies, the more we can speak up and hopefully make changes, not just for us but for all women and future generations."

Do you suffer from a pelvic health condition? What are your thoughts? Share with us in the comment section below.

Feature image: Getty.

Well by Mamamia. Australian women, welcome to your full-body health check. At Well, our goal is to improve the health of one million Aussie women by delivering the game-changing health info they actually need. This initiative is made possible through the support of our presenting partner, Chemist Warehouse, and our pelvic health topic sponsors, Metagenics and Chemist Warehouse.