
No matter how much I try to convince myself otherwise, my desire for acceptance from my parents will never go away. I grew up in a strict Catholic home, where religion was the foundation for our family.
There was a lot of love in our home; no one could argue that. But everything revolved around the church and I learned as an adult: without religion, there wasn’t a solid foundation for our family.
When we were kids, our parents built our daily life around a church schedule. Catechism classes every Wednesday, which my parents both taught. Thursday afternoons were for altar server practice. Confessions were on Saturdays, which we could not miss, or else we’d be forbidden to have Sunday communion.
In our family, our relationship with God was more important than our career, our well-being, our education, and our family.
As I grew older, I became confused with most of the practices in our Catholic home. I wish they didn’t ground me for questioning certain rituals – like why it was necessary to confess to a priest every week.
I wish they didn’t tell me my body was a temple only for God, and I wish they didn’t teach me anyone who had sex before marriage was a sinner and in desperate need of my prayers.
Dr Justin Coulson helps a podcast listener who’s worried she’s yelling at her kids too much. He discusses dealing with conflict without raising your voice. Post continues below.
In high school, my best friend lost her virginity and she called me crying after it happened. She was confused, scared, and needed someone to talk to. I responded with anger. I was only mimicking what I learned was appropriate in that situation.