'The 5 things that completely saved my sanity on a holiday with two kids.'

Flying on a plane with two children is a raging hellscape, to put it mildly.

Somehow, within minutes of boarding, every single thing I've packed is everywhere, the one toy my kids actually want to play with has fallen under the seat and cannot be extracted for the duration of the flight, and one child has strangled the other with a set of headphones. There are biscuit crumbs everywhere. In the distance, sirens. 

I don't pretend to have solved the general chaos of international travel with toddlers, but after much trial and error on a recent trip to Fiji, I do have some recommendations for how to not to completely lose your marbles on the plane (and during the "holiday" which follows).

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1. Things which have compartments. 

For this trip, I bought a new Nere tote bag to use for a carry-on bag, which had a cross-body strap as well as handles, and also slips over the handle of a suitcase.

It has multiple internal and external pockets, and not to give myself away as a massive loser, but nothing gets me excited like multiple storage options inside one bag. One for snacks, one for nappies and wipes, one for toys, and one for my stuff (Kindle, headphones, lip balm, earplugs).

Things still got jumbled around during the flight, but not as badly as they normally do, and I am calling that a win. 

Image: Supplied.

2. Things which can be strapped to me. 

You'll note that I didn't list my phone in the above point about things I need a compartment for, and that is because I have now joined the ranks of people who have my phone strapped directly to my person. Does that look "cool"? Well, I think it does, actually, but you can decide.

I am currently obsessed with this pearl RIKKA strap, which I personally think is very glamorous. Having my phone strapped to me meant a 400 per cent reduction in "oh no where's my phone gone" moments, and an 800 per cent increase in the number of photos I took across the trip, because my phone was right there. 

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In the past, I have also enjoyed strapping my children to me. I have used the ErgoBaby360 carrier on many flights — the only downside is having to unstrap it for take-off and landing. Tragically, my toddlers are too "old" and "independent" and "able to walk" to be strapped to me, but rest assured – if I could, I would. 

Do I strap my giant bag on, and then strap my phone on, and then resemble a donkey on a long journey to Bethlehem as I traverse the airport? Sure! But do I lose things? I absolutely do not!

3. Things which can be hosed down.

Man, I love to hose things down. Shoes, bags, children, I'd hose 'em all if I could. Nothing rivals the good, clean high of a plastic item scrubbing up good as new after your children have done their level best to destroy it. 

I was already a convert to kids' shoes which can be rinsed (Crocs are an excellent option, but there are loads of similar styles – my youngest's current beach shoes are from Kmart and do the job wonderfully), but I only discovered the joy of a washable beach bag on my most recent trip. One of my kids knocked a full iced latte into my Kove & Co bag and I rinsed it clean in the warm waters of the Pacific Ocean. Now that's holiday magic. 

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4. A beauty routine which requires zero thought or effort. 

If you think cosmetic tips have nothing to do with travelling with children, THINK AGAIN. Anyone who cares about looking nice in their holiday photos (so, everyone, don't lie to me) needs an easy-breezy holiday face, but mums need an easy-breezy holiday face that travels well and can be executed in under 4 minutes because your children will lose their tiny minds if they don't get to the breakfast buffet right now. The answer is: sticks. 

Look, I don't know their technical names, but I'm going to go with sticks because I think it gets the point across just fine. These Mecca Max Blush and Bronzer sticks are $20 each and were all I wore on my face aside from CC cream and sunscreen.

They can't spill, smash or crack like liquid or powder products, and they take 0.4 seconds to apply.

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5. Sun protection for your kids. 

There is nothing which ruins a relaxing holiday vibe like having to wrestle your slippery, sandy, wiggling children into a chokehold to apply more sunscreen. Sun protection is important, obviously, but so is protecting my peace while I drink a cocktail, which is why my tried-and-tested approach is to make sure that barely any parts of my children are exposed to the sun in the first place. 

After searching for a while, I found full-length swimmers from Kooba Kids (I know we all love to get our legs out, but I can't for the life of me understand why most kids' swimwear stops way above the knee). 

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As for hats, I do not f*ck around. I want my child's hat to be so hard to take off that they won't be able to remove it until university. I've found Plow Surf hats to be excellent for this, plus they have a neck flap to really cover all your bases and, erm, skin.

Image: Supplied.

Yes, they're so covered up and look like tiny beekeepers, but let me tell you, we spent 6 full days in the Fijian sun and nobody got burnt (except me, because I am an idiot). 

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