Oprah just called family estrangement an 'epidemic.' A relationship coach claims she caused it.

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Earlier this week, Oprah conducted a meaty interview about the rising trend of family estrangement.

The hour-long conversation, which was described on her YouTube channel as "groundbreaking," featured parents and children on both sides of "no contact," along with leading relationship experts. 

"It's estimated one third of Americans have cut off ties, or is estranged, from their family," Oprah said, describing the trend as "one of the fastest-growing cultural shifts of our time."

The host then referred to family estrangement as a "silent epidemic."

"Social media has millions of videos with the hashtag 'no contact' from adult children who say that their parent or their sibling is toxic, and they've had enough. So, what is going on?"

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In just four days, the video has amassed over two million views. And while comments have been turned off, that hasn't stopped people from sharing their thoughts elsewhere.

Tania Khazaal, a family relationship coach, was one of the voices who joined the conversation.

She posed an interesting question; that Oprah may have helped fuel the rise in estrangement herself.

"So now Oprah is shocked by the aftermath of estrangement, after being one of the biggest voices pushing it for decades?," Tania asked in an Instagram video.

"Oprah was one of the strongest voices pushing the normalisation of family cutoffs.

"And not by accident, publicly, repeatedly and openly."

Watch: Family relationship coach Tania responds to Oprah's estrangement interview. Post continues below.

Tania claimed Oprah's amplification of family estrangement started in the 90s and has continued to the present day. She referenced articles about toxic family dynamics on Oprah's website.

"Look at the trail. She wasn't neutral. She wasn't asking questions. She amplified the very messaging that contributed to millions of parents and children walking away from one another," she argued.

The relationship coach, who has personal experience with estrangement, questioned why Oprah was shocked by the "sudden heartbreaking epidemic" when she had a "hand in shaping" it.

"As if she's observing the disaster from the outside? As if she didn't help lay the foundation and now picked up a microphone and said, 'Wow, how did this happen?"

Tania clarified that she thinks conversations about estrangement are important, but we shouldn't "rewrite history."

"You cannot promote cutting off family for so many years, decades, and then come back acting like you're here to fix it," she said.

"Estrangement isn't entertainment or a trending conversation piece. It's real families, real grief… Generations are now breaking, families getting destroyed. Let's talk about the truth, not the highlight reel.

"Let's talk about what repair actually takes."

Tania's video has received a mixed reaction. Some agreed with Tania's criticisms, while others defended Oprah's intentions behind the conversation.

Oprah, herself, also responded in the comments, writing: "Happy to have a conversation about it — but not on a reel. Will have my producer contact you if you're interested."

Oprah's own estrangement story.

Over the years, Oprah has spoken about estrangement on many occasions and has opened up about her own fraught relationship with her late mother, Vernita Lee.

Vernita was just 18 when she gave birth to Oprah, who was then raised by her maternal grandmother for six years. 

When she eventually moved in with her mother, Vernita felt like a stranger.

"I walked into that space feeling completely alone and abandoned," she told HuffPost in 2015. 

Her childhood was rough. Oprah ran away from home, slept on the porch, and was allegedly sexually abused by relatives and friends.

"I started acting out my need for attention, my need to be loved," Oprah told the Washington Post.

"My mother didn't have the time. She worked every day as a maid.

"I was smart and my mother, because she didn't have the time for me, I think, tried to stifle it." 

At 14 years old, Oprah fell pregnant and was sent to live with her father, Vernon Winfrey. She gave birth two weeks later, but the baby was premature and didn't survive.

The host has since credited Vernon for "chang[ing] the course of her life." He passed away in 2022.

The Oprah Winfrey Show made Oprah a household name and ran for 25 seasons from 1986 to 2011. Image: AP via AAP.

"He saved me. He simply knew what he wanted and expected. He would take nothing less," she told the Washington Post.

In 1993, Oprah told Ebony that she didn't "see or hear" from her mother again until she became a public figure.

"That was seven years," she said. "So when she shows up, I'm like: 'What am I supposed to feel?'"

Oprah turned to the Bible and decided she owed her parents "honour and respect," and has since helped them financially.

Listen: On 'This Is Why We Fight' two estranged sisters explore whether they can repair their rift. Post continues below.

In 2010, Oprah found out she had a secret half-sister, Patricia, who her mum had put up for adoption.

Though they repaired their relationship, Oprah has been candid about the difficult moments with Vernita.

Speaking on The Oprah Podcast earlier this year, the host recalled struggling to "think of one memory" with her mother during a speech in church.

"I couldn't think of one thing," she said. "And so, when it came time for me to speak, I thought, 'Well what do I actually have to be grateful for?'"

Oprah went on to say that Vernita "did the best that she knew" at the time, but it was "not enough" for her.

"The best that she knew was not enough to feed what I needed, was not enough to make me feel whole, was not enough to make me feel valued or seen or important to her," she said.

"But it was the best that she could do, and I gave up the hope that it could have been anything other than what she had."

When Vernita died in 2018, Oprah told People about her final words to her mother.

"What I said was, 'Thank you, because I know it's been hard for you… I know that you always did the best you knew how to do. And look how it turned out.'"

Oprah's perspective on estrangement isn't just theoretical — she lived it, having spent seven years without contact with her mother before rebuilding their relationship.

That lived experience may explain why her voice has resonated so strongly with audiences, even as some critics now question whether that influence went too far.

Feature Image: YouTube/Oprah/Instagram/@taniakhazaal

*Mamamia has reached out to Tania Khazaal for comment.