What no one told me about the first 12 months of my baby's life.

I was ever-so prepared for baby’s arrival, if all you needed was some cute onesies, a whole lot of optimism and a car capsule to bring them home from hospital.    

But that’s not all you need is it? Oh no. You need to prepare. Read books. Ask questions. Watch and observe from the mothers that surround you (and oddly make it look like raising a child is a piece of cake, when we all know it SO isn’t).

Handy know-how comes in handy at any stage of your parenthood journey and will save lots of tears – yours and baby’s – and help you be more of the fun, chilled and ready-for-anything mum you dreamed you would be.

Skin tags pop up on you like marker flags.  

It’s like they’re announcing what part of your body is no longer your own and marks its territory on behalf of your wombmate. Harmless, yes. Painless, uh-huh. But UGLY! They will grow in places like under your boobs and in skin folds that weren’t part of your buff bod nine months ago. Sigh. All-day maternity bras only seem to make it worse, but the best news is that they only seem to last as long as baby fits in triple zeros.

Image: Supplied.

Smooth as a baby’s bottom? 

Not always. Full term babies can exit looking a little red, dry and ‘overcooked’. Certain soaps, fragranced products and low humidity can dry out a baby’s delicate skin further, causing it to become chapped, scaly and uncomfortable.

It’s essential to use a non-irritating moisturiser like the Cetaphil Baby Advanced Protection Cream to quickly get that baby skin back to its super-soft best.

This one’s a goodie that can also be used on baby’s precious little face and contains soothing organic calendula extract and is clinically proven to nourish the skin for up to eight hours. It’s hypoallergenic, non-sticky and light and will go on fast and fuss-free (which is exactly what you want when looking after a tiny human). It’s also, ahem, endorsed by the Australian College of Midwives, no less.

Your hands will be instant proof that you are a mother of a newborn.

You might have taken off your rings because of the swelling, but the cracks and dry patches are a dead giveaway for exactly where your hands have been for weeks on end. The constant washing, bathing, nappy changing, wiping, cleaning and repeating cause cracks and scaly hands as dry as an outback track. Resting them is not an option as a new mum, so try to remember to pinch some of the multi-purpose Cetaphil Baby Advanced Protection Cream from the baby bag and try it on yourself – the soothing calendula extract will work wonders. 

Crouching on the floor to be with your new little bestie for tummy time will also cause dry, dark and scuffy knees, so a hydrating cream is your ticket to Smoothville.

Bath time is laugh time. 

My babies were always so happy splashing about and it always made the bedtime routine much more joyful. There’s a saying I heard somewhere that “if baby is having a bad day, put them in in the bath”. It was a never-fail method of mine to turn a rough day around by giving my baby a turn in the tub and singing them a round of Rubber Ducky.

New BFFs will come into your life when you least expect it. 

You’ll be wearing the same trackies you have worn all week, your maternity bra is unhooked on one side and the messy bun is about the extent of your beauty routine – but your mother’s group gang won’t even notice. They’ll lift you up, settle the baby and be the source of advice, laughs, hugs and help. 

Image: Supplied.

After a while you emerge out of the messy bun slump, but your new buddies will stay. You’ll reminisce about the early days and each lament where the time went. Your children, just like their mothers, will grow together and it will be so lovely. I like to think of these friendships as the real baby bonus (just so much more valuable).

Poo explosions happen. 

There’s no way around it. Don’t be afraid, just prepared. Big poonamis more than likely happen when you’re in the car, at the shops or baby is being cradled by an adoring relative. Black, green, mustard or brown, there will be poos that defy the nappy’s absorbency claims and escape, often straight up the back. 

If your nappy bag is stocked with wipes, nappies and a set of clothes then you’ll be spared a mad dash to Aldi while your husband keeps the pooey baby entertained in the back of the SUV in a public carpark. And before you ask, yes, this happened to us.

Those teeny tiny lumps on their arms and thighs are SO COMMON. 

Don’t worry, they’re probably just keratosis pilaris, a build up of keratin in the hair follicle. It’s harmless but can be treated by using a mild, non-soap cleansing wash and slathering on some moisturiser a couple of times a day. And you got it, the trusty Cetaphil Baby products are the goods once again because they won’t irritate.

Things that used to matter, won’t. 

Suddenly the world revolves around your baby and you’re here for it. Your perspective will change. You’ll swap margarita glasses for baby bottles on Saturday nights and won’t even care. It’s a new world and it’s the best.

*Australian College of Midwives receives a financial donation by Cetaphil Baby. 

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