Oh, this is… grim.
It’s also something I never thought I’d be writing about in my entire life, but here we are.
It’s about porn. And property.
Not “property porn”, like perving on beautiful houses you’ll never be able to afford. (Though I guess it’s a similar sentiment… in a way).
No, there’s a whole new genre of porn that revolves around the plight of poor millennials and our never-ending struggle to climb the property ladder.
Yes, you read that correctly.
As reported by Vice, there’s a new porn genre called “PropertySex”, and it’s bringing a whole new meaning to the term ‘open inspection’.
It comprises of fictional tales of desperate tenants who trade sexual favours for a roof over their heads – touted as the “’90s pizza delivery boy fantasy” of our era.
In one video, a hopeful tenant who can’t afford her exorbitant bond commitment unbuttons her blouse and drops to her knees in front of her live-in landlord in an effort to… persuade… him.
…I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
It’s is a real thing that exists on the internet, people. You cannot make this stuff up.
Side note: I researched PropertySex on my work computer (wasn’t fired), and I must admit the tagline – “putting the home in homemade porn” – is brilliant. Credit where credit’s due.