There’s a new song. If you have children under 12, soon you’re going to know it like you know your own name.
Soon, your daughter will be belting it out at full volume when you’re trying to get her to brush her teeth.
Soon, YouTube will be crammed with videos of toddlers, lip-syncing teens and men in dresses singing it.
Soon, contestants on the X Factor will be testing their Mariah-inspired vocal gymnastics against it in an attempt to make Iggy Azelea smile. She won’t.
It’s called ‘How Far I’ll Go’ and it’s from the Disney movie, Moana. It’s written by Lin-Manuel Miranda. You might have heard of this other thing he wrote – a musical called Hamilton.
And with that chorus earworming its way into the brains of little people everywhere, it’s official. The three-year-long Frozen era is finally over. There’s a new heroine in town.
Thank God.
Goodbye, Elsa. Gooooooodbyeeeeeee....
Not that we didn't love Frozen. Those of us whose children passed through the preschool years during Elsa's reign will always carry the bittersweet scars. Our daughter's kindy photos in that ubiquitous blue, polyester dress. The parties featuring a drama student in a blonde wig handing out Olaf-pops. The frustration of trying to perfect snowflake icing.
We've paid our dues. We've earned Moana.
If you've looked at the posters and thought the star of this animated movie is the fearsome-looking demigod, Maui (played by The Rock, aka Dwayne Johnson), you're wrong. It's all about the girl.