'The 6 answers I needed about the social media age restriction that's coming.'

Thanks to our brand partner, The Australian Government

Have you been repeatedly telling your teens and tweens they need to prepare for changed access to social media before December 10? And then met with the standard "yeah whatever"?

In all seriousness, I don't know any parents who aren't worried about the impact of phones in general — and social media in particular — on their under-16s.

Of course, we're the parents — the bosses, we think we are the gatekeepers of what our under-16-year-olds can access. But it's wishful thinking to believe we alone can control the modern online environment that's swept across the world over the past decade and changed almost everything.

I've been so thrilled parents are finally getting support with Australia's under-16 social media delay. 

The ban isn't really a ban, it's a delay and any repercussions for under-16s on social platforms after it comes into effect will be worn by the tech companies, not by your 14-year-old. Good news, indeed.

We know it's for our kids' wellbeing, but it's been tricky to engage with my kids, who are under the impression they'll be able to create a workaround.

While the platforms that will have age restrictions have now been confirmed by the eSafety Commissioner, those platforms are now expected to reach out to account holders directly to confirm how they will verify ages for those under-16. 

I bet you have many questions about the delay though and how your family can prepare. I did, and do. So for this story, I went on a mission to get some answers from Dr Marie Yap, a professor and psychologist specialising in parenting and youth mental health, about why the delay is happening and how we can talk to our kids about it.

I hope this little cheat sheet helps. Solidarity, friends.

But first, what is the social media minimum age delay?

As of December 10, the social media platforms on this list will have to take "reasonable steps" to make sure that account holders both existing and new are 16 or over. For now, this includes Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Threads, TikTok, X, YouTube, Kick and Reddit.

It does not mean that some of these platforms will completely disappear for under-16s — for example, they can still view content on YouTube — but they will not be able to be logged in to their own account with their own details.

And if you're wondering what happens if your kids haven't been entirely honest about their date of birth when setting up their accounts: social media platforms don't just rely on that. They'll look at a range of data to determine whether an account belongs to an adult or someone under 16. This could include — though isn't limited to — the type of content viewed, login times and other technology used to verify age. Platforms will confirm the details in the lead-up to December 10.

The eSafety website breaks this all down for you. They have a great information hub offering comprehensive and practical resources, including guides, webinars, FAQs and conversation tips to help parents and carers navigate this transition and talk to their kids.

Why is this delay a good idea from a youth mental health perspective?

Dr Marie Yapp: "The most reliable evidence now is clear that social media use easily gets out of hand. When it does, it has impacts on young people's development and mental health, and we need to do whatever we can to reduce that impact.

"There's been a lot of research done around the world in the past 10 years about young people and social media, particularly about how addictive it seems to be. Young people are often on multiple platforms because they are connecting with different peers across different platforms that are very effective and very successful at hooking users back.

"Those platforms use age-old, proven marketing, human behaviour type of strategies and techniques to get the users back. These strategies are not age-specific, they are based on general psychology research, and they are very effective across all ages.

"A major issue with young people being on these platforms is that they don't have the same maturity as adults, both in terms of their ability to think and plan ahead, and also literally in terms of brain development, to have the neural capacity to monitor and regulate, to exercise self-control. So they're not thinking: 'Maybe I've been on this too long, or maybe this isn't a good time to be on this because I'm meant to be studying or doing homework.'

"And of course, they also lack the foresight adults have to see social media as just one part of their life, with other things that deserve their time, attention and focus."

What is the most compelling piece of evidence you could give me that illustrates the benefits of delayed social media access?

Dr Marie Yapp: "There are a lot of advantages and disadvantages to young people being online.

"More recent research has looked at [social media use] over time, so we look at young people who used social media when they were in early adolescence, and then we follow them.

"Whether they used it at a younger age — what we call prospective use — can predict their mental health in the years that follow. Research like this gives us a clearer sense of what comes first: social media use or mental health problems.

"Research into the causal influence of social media use on brain development outcomes has provided enough reason for people to say: 'This is concerning enough for us to do something about it.'

"It's not the only problem or issue causing mental health problems in young people, but it's something we can pinpoint, and we need to do something about it."

How do I talk to my kids about the ban?

Dr Marie Yapp: "If a young person asks, 'Why are they doing this to us?' it's important to help them see that it's not something done against them — it's actually done for them.

"We're not banning young people from using social media; the restriction is on the platforms and the onus is on the companies to reduce young people's use. It's not about punishing kids; it's about limiting how social media companies can target and hook young users."

How do you suggest we talk to young people who insist they can get around the ban?

Dr Marie Yapp: "It depends on the relationship a parent has with their child, the child's age, how strongly they feel about the upcoming change, and whether they're already hooked or still exploring.

"Generally, I would recommend that parents give their child the opportunity to honestly share how they feel. This not only helps the parent understand the best approach to take but also ensures the young person feels they can be open, rather than thinking, 'Oh, I know mum's against this, so I better not tell her.'

"Parents should guide and talk with their child, and monitor what happens from here — whether the young person might get sneaky with friends or share what they genuinely enjoy about social media. This way, a parent can acknowledge the positive aspects: 'I can see why you enjoy that. Maybe there's another platform where you can get the same benefits in line with the new rules.' It's about working with where the child is at rather than imposing a strict rule."

I talk to my son about my worries around social media rather than what he's doing wrong. Is that a good approach?

Dr Marie Yapp: "As a psychologist, I'd choose different words — ways to express it without using the word 'worry', so the child isn't encouraged to feel more anxious, thinking, 'Mum's always worried.'"

Hear that? Worry less, parents.

Visit the Social Media Age Restriction Hub on the eSafety website for more information.

Feature Image: Supplied.

From December 10, you need to be 16 or over to have an account on social media. It's part of a new law designed to help young people stay safer online. Think of it as a little extra time to grow, learn, and build those digital superpowers — like critical thinking, resilience, and online smarts — before diving into the social media world. A national awareness campaign is already in motion, with ads, community events, and expert chats helping parents, carers, and teens get ready for the change. For all the details, head to esafety.gov.au