25 messages my 25 year-old self needed to hear before fatherhood

1. Sleep.

2. Travel to the most difficult places. Go to South America.

3. If it’s 2am on a Saturday, you should keep partying. Because you’ll be at 2am a lot in the future and you definitely won’t be partying.

4. Go to as many restaurants as you can.

5. If you hate your job, just quit.

6. Your job is just a job. Your real job will be your family. Just do the 9-5 and get home ASAP. Watch The Motherish team confess what they do after heir kids are in bed. (Post continues after video.)

7. Listen to your partner. She loves you. She probably knows you better than you know yourself.

8. Watch lots of comedy. You’ll need to laugh as you get older.

9. Your kids will give you the best laughs. Kids are bloody hilarious.

10. Don’t pretend to be like other people just to be accepted. Forge your own path.

11. Go out with your friends as much as possible. You might see of bff two to three times a year once you have kids.

12. It’s okay to listen to commercial radio. You won’t be able to listen to TripleJ anymore because of all the Aussie rappers that swear constantly that get airplay every 12 minutes.

13. Avoid hipsterdom. It’ll turn you into a wanker. If you like watching The Bachelor don’t be ashamed. Every parent I know watches that show and loves it. Anyone who judges you is an insecure loser.

14. Be yourself. Don’t let a work/the world change you. Being true to yourself will make you a better parent.

15. Get ready to bounce back. You’ll be doing that A LOT. And you’ll have to learn how to do it with a few hours sleep.

16. Be patient. Things will happen or maybe they won’t. It’s ok.

17. Watch your favourite kids shows again because you’ll get to introduce them to your kid. And yes, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles still kicks ass.

18. Stop complaining about being tired. You’re not tired because you don’t have kids, yet. You’re just doing too much.

19. Don’t judge other people for taking sick days. You’ll be taking stacks once you’ve got kids.

20. Don’t stress so much. In a few years you’ll be responsible for keeping someone alive. Then you’re entitled to stress.

21. Be spontaneous. If you’re inspired, just walk out the door and do whatever you want. It’ll take you about 45 minutes to leave the house when you’re a parent.

22. If a parent is complaining about their kids, please don’t offer advice. Just shut up and offer to buy them a coffee.

23. Go and watch two movies in one day. It now takes me two weeks to watch a film.

24. Go everywhere that is not pram friendly.

25. Everything you’re doing right now is the support act. The main event starts when the kid arrives.

What else would you say to your former childless self?