Best and Worst: The 'moving to New York' edition.

Welcome to Best and Worst.

In case you’re new here, Best and Worst is Mamamia’s weekly Friday tradition. It’s the space where our writers and readers come together to recap our weeks, to vent our frustrations and to celebrate our happy times.

I’ll start by sharing my week’s highlight: I’m about to move to the concrete jungle. The land of bagels, baseball and alligators in sewers.

Aka my spirit home, New York City.

I’m so excited! Also confused. Because I’ve receive a barrage of well-meaning advice from acquaintances, friends and even strangers who have a ‘connection’ with the city and are self-styled experts on living there.

And every time someone imparts a word of wisdom, I think I’ve found The Answer to smoothly moving overseas — only to be given directly contradictory advice about two hours later.

The bewildering tips I’ve received so far include:

1. Without an artic-style puffy jacket, you will freeze.

2. The weather is boiling. Bring bathers.

3.  Every apartment gets snapped up within hours, so don’t bother home-hunting ’til you get there.

4. But lock an apartment down like YESTERDAY, because it’s an insanely competitive rental market.

7. Williamsburg is the cool area.

8. Williamsburg is gross now, you yuppie!

9. Ship all your stuff over because it’s so damn expensive there.

10. Are you mad? It’s the fashion capital of the world, so buy a new wardrobe there.

11. Tip 15 percent.

12. Tip 20 percent.

13. Tip 18 percent.

14. You should make loads of friends via MeetUp groups.

15. Also, never talk to anybody because they’re terrifying.

16. You’ll have to go to all those classic restaurants from the movies.

17. Don’t go to Katz’s deli, you tourist!

As a result of all this well-meaning advice, I’ve been spun into a web of first-world bewilderment. My solution, for now, is to dump all my clothes into some large striped storage bags, rent an Airbnb in the East Village for the first few days and take it from there.

Is there anybody out there who can just tell me that’s a perfect plan?

Anybody?

What are the lowlights and highlights of your week?

On a related note, we bring you some very famous residents of New York: