'In 2021, I lost my husband to an opioid addiction. It was his doctors who failed him.'

This story discusses serious addiction issues and could be triggering for some readers. 

Whenever Linda would walk into her bedroom and see her then husband Brad asleep in bed, she feared he was dead. 

This is the reality of living with someone who has a serious drug addiction associated with life or death consequences. Sadly for Linda, her ex-husband's life was eventually taken by addiction, leaving her and their three kids to pick up the pieces. 

When Linda first met Brad back in 2016 on an online dating app, she immediately thought he was lovely.

"He had a great sense of humour, and we had a lot in common. Brad had so many passions as well, whether it was tech, true crime, movies or the Melbourne Storm team," she tells Mamamia.

But the type of person he then became in the cloud of addiction was completely different to the Brad who Linda had fallen in love with. 

Watch: Jamie Lee Curtis reflections on a life nearly lost to addiction. Post continues below. 

A year or so down the track in their relationship, they were married. And expecting triplets.

Throughout their time together, Linda knew Brad had a series of health issues, including stomach ulcers and a rare autoimmune disorder. But she soon realised that the amount of medication he was taking didn't match up with the diagnoses or the state of his health.

"In 2017 he was put on oxycodone painkillers for a couple of weeks after a surgery, but then eight months after the surgery he was still on them. The doctor who had prescribed these didn't seem to be in a great hurry to get him off them," Linda reflects.

But the damage appeared to have been done. 

"It was clear he had become addicted. I now have copies of Brad's medical referrals from the time, and they note that he had an opioid dependence. The doctors knew."

After a short break off the oxycodone, Brad then began complaining of headaches. Linda says Brad's doctor then prescribed him opioids again, despite knowing the vulnerability of dependence.

Yet another opioid drug was then given to Brad, and his addiction grew. Linda feels Brad was initially dealing with a bout of sore headaches, like he said — but as he continued to overtake the prescription meds, he was no longer using them as pain-relief.

"There would be weekends where we'd sit at the dinner table, he would appear completely fine and not voice any issues, walk into the bedroom, walk back out and say he had called an ambulance and had to be taken to hospital.

"This would go on and on, and I was so frustrated because he didn't need to use an ambulance, I offered to drive him. As soon as the paramedics would arrive, he would double over and begin to exaggerate — all in a ploy to be given a dose of fentanyl or morphine in the ambulance."

Linda continues: "As soon as he got back on the drugs, nothing was going to stop him."

As Brad's addiction worsened, his personality changed.

While he was high on the prescription painkillers, he would sleep all the time. He wouldn't help around the house, let alone with the kids. When he was withdrawing, his moods were worse — snappy, negative, unreasonable, sweating profusely, dealing with withdrawal symptoms such as excessive vomiting.

It took a toll on their marriage as well. She would beg him to acknowledge he had a problem, beg to speak to his doctor or go to the doctors with him, beg for him to go to rehab — anything to keep him from hurting himself. But it was hurting their family too.

"Our triplets were born premature at 32 weeks. He wasn't engaged at all. When we finally were able to bring the kids home, he didn't even come with me to take them, my sister had to. This was around April 2020. I was expressing around the clock, my sister stayed three months at our place to help because Brad did nothing. Then my parents had to move in once my sister left, because I couldn't do it on my own," Linda says. 

Linda's mental health was waning as a result, on top of the hormones, sleep deprivation and babies. She says their family were a huge source of support for her, and they too tried to assist Brad in getting the help he needed. But it would fall on deaf ears. 

"I worried [he would die] the whole time we were together. I would walk into our bedroom, tensing myself because I feared I would find him dead in the bed. Both myself and his family sadly felt it was just going to be a matter of time."

As Brad's health, and their relationship continued to deteriorate, Linda told Brad she wanted to separate in Christmas 2020, and Brad moved out of their home.

"One of the final straws, among many, was that I found out he had taken the painkillers I was prescribed while recovering from my C-section, and he had used them. Realising that, I knew I couldn't take it anymore."

Then in June 2021, after days of unanswered calls and messages, police entered Brad's unit to perform a welfare check. They found he had died, still clutching prescription medication in his hand.

A pathologist later determined he had died of an unintentional opioid painkiller overdose.

Brad with his kids, and Brad on his wedding day. Image: Supplied. 

"My dad used to be a detective, so I asked him to go around and knock on Brad's door to make sure he was okay. When he couldn't get in, but noticed his car was still in the driveway, he got the keys from the real estate agent, called the police, and they found him," Linda says.

"My dad then called to tell me the news. Having to tell Brad's mum and dad was the hardest."

In the six months leading up to his death, the coroner found Brad was prescribed 988 tapentadol tablets, 1,785 oxycodone tablets and 556 diazepam tablets. The coroner said nine Melbourne GPs filled out prescriptions for Brad without checking a government database designed to prevent "doctor shopping".

Had the GPs looked up his record on SafeScript, they would have seen a series of amber and red alerts.

Some doctors also failed to secure permits to prescribe the medications, which were categorised as Schedule 8 poisons.

The fact this all happened deeply angers Linda. 

"It's horrible. I've had a lot of anger towards him, towards the situation, towards the doctors and system," she says.

"It's such an avoidable death. Yes, he was doing the wrong thing and he made some bad and stupid choices over a sustained amount of time. So he's definitely not blameless in this whole thing. But it shouldn't have been so easy for him to get the amount of drugs that he did for so long."

Nowadays, Linda's parents still live with her to help out with the kids. She's back working part-time hours to support her family, the triplets soon off to Kinder. She knows one day they will come home and ask why they don't have a dad, comparing themselves to other kids in their class. 

Linda says she still isn't sure what she will say to them just yet. She just knows it will be a tricky conversation.

"I don't want Brad's legacy to be that he was just a drug addict. If I can, I want to do something to stop this from happening to somebody else to make sure that the systems are better. That way, maybe his legacy can evolve and I can share that with his kids," she says.

"There have been moments of joy throughout the last few years, although fleeting. But there's also been a lot of heartache and pain. My kids are turning out to be such funny, amazing little people. How they see the world is really beautiful. And that gives me comfort, despite all of that's happened."

If this post brought up any issues for you, you can contact Drug Aware, Australia's 24hr alcohol and drug support line. You can reach them on (08) 9442 5000 or 1800 198 024. 

Feature Image: Supplied. 

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