Having a long distance best friend is hard. But people don't talk enough about the advantages.

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Amy and I met in Mexico on a Contiki trip seven years ago, and bonded over the fact we were both born in the small Victorian town of Mildura. 

Like a holiday romance that never went back to reality, we've spent our entire friendship living in separate countries and cities. 

The smell of coconut sunscreen, the sound of holiday playlists and the relaxation level you reach when you're two cocktails deep on a foreign beach — these are the pillars around which we've existed in one another's lives. 

When we catchup it's not for a meal or an event, it's an extended period. We sleep, eat and exist as one for days at a time after months spent apart.

We've at least closed the gap in recent years. We've gone from living 16,800km from each other, to 877km. But even still we've spent more time on phone calls than in person. 

Despite the distance, it works. 

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We walk on Sunday mornings every week. Her along the beach-front in St Kilda, Melbourne — me along the waterfront of Coogee, Sydney. We notice when we skip a week, and jabber on twice as long when we get back on the phone after a fortnight. 

We know every major player in each other's lives and how they intertwine, and yet she's never met my parents. I've never met her brother. 

Having a long distance best friend means we spend a lot of time talking about 'what ifs.' 

She's the person I want to make plans with when I find myself with a free Saturday. But I can't.

She's the friend I have needed over the years when I've gone through breakups or conflict or sadness. But I have to settle for a phone call, not a cry on her couch. 

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I forgot her birthday this year. She had to remind me on our Sunday morning chat that she'd turned 28 during the week. These are the kinds of mortifying details you miss when your friendship exists on opposite ends of the country. If she'd have been here, we would have had plans on her birthday. 

Thankfully, she forgave me, and Deliveroo had some Shiraz on her doorstep before the day's end to soften the blow. 

It's a unique bond that gets us through. 

Our friendship was forged amid allergic reactions in Caye Caulker (me), physical exhaustion from climbing the hill of Srđ in Dubrovnik (Amy), and heat exhaustion on a particularly sweltering night in Tulum (me). But because it's all mixed in with intoxicating memories; perfect meals with perfect views in Santorini, fortress exploring in Montenegro and sailing through the Adriatic Sea, it's cemented us together in an unbreakable way. 

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I can tell her to piss off. She tells me when I'm annoying. She can tell when I am about 30 minutes away from 'hangry', and I know when she's in need of an hour of me-time.

We are platonic friends but we know each other like lovers might. The difference being, in a sexual relationship, long-distance has to end one day. Ultimately, you are apart for a time, until you can work out how to be in the one spot. 

But we don't want to live with each other, even though we'd love to live near each other. She's not my life partner — I have one of those too. 

Even though we're so close, we don't get annoyed when the other takes a week to respond to a message. We don't blink an eye when the other has to reschedule due to travel or plans or time-zones. There's an accepted distance to our intimacy that you're not afforded when you're dating someone. We've removed all of that unnecessary admin, and we can, because we aren't each other's future. We're not planning a life together — we just want to spend slices of life, together.

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We've come to terms with the fact we might be long distance forever. 

But for all the reasons that kind of set up might be toxic after a while in a love match, it's the secret to how we keep our friendship exciting.

I've got all the benefits of a 'holiday romance' (except the sex of course), without having to worry about breaking anyone's heart. 

You can keep up to date with Gemma Bath's articles here, or follow her on Instagram, @gembath.

Feature image: Gemma Bath/Mamamia.