'I've been with my partner for 18 years and we've never lived together — and I love it.'

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While society has long pushed the narrative that love equals cohabitation, a growing number of Australian couples are saying "thanks, but no, thanks" to the moving truck.

Welcome to the world of LAT — Living Apart Together — where committed couples choose separate front door keys over shared wardrobes.

And they've never been happier.

Watch: But Are You Happy? shares how to say no to people. Post continues below.

I'll be honest — as a divorced, single mum, I get it completely. I live alone half the time and I've fallen head-over-heels in love with my own space.

The thought of living with another man? Zero appeal. A women's and children's-only commune? Could tempt me.

But blending my kids with another bloke's? The very idea makes me want to hide under my perfectly arranged throw cushions that no one else gets to move.

What is the LAT (Living Apart Together) trend?

LAT refers to couples who are in committed, often long-term, romantic relationships but maintain separate residences by choice, not circumstance.

This isn't about long-distance relationships or temporary separations due to work — it's a deliberate, stable lifestyle choice that's quietly revolutionising how we think about modern love.

And the numbers don't lie.

Recent estimates show that about 7 to 9% of Australians are currently in LAT relationships, with women — particularly older women — leading the charge.

After years of traditional family responsibilities, many are discovering the intoxicating freedom of having their cake and eating it too: deep love without domestic compromise.

The 18-year love story.

Take Louise*, who told Mamamia she's been with her partner for 18 years without ever sharing a postcode.

"It bothered me at the start that he didn't want to live together, but now I love it," she admitted. "He spends most nights at my place anyway, but we have our own space."

The practical benefits are undeniable. He can work from home without disrupting her business, and legally, keeping her house separate means a smoother inheritance path for her adult children.

"I have adult children and I want my house to go to them when I pass on. Having him not living there makes this legally smoother," she said.

"Plus, I also really love that my house is decked out with my items, totally to my taste, and I don't have to have his 'things' everywhere."

The anti-Brady Bunch movement.

Perhaps nowhere is the LAT trend more revolutionary than amongst divorced parents. For *Priya, she and her partner both have three children each from previous relationships.

They made their intentions clear on their third date — well before they'd even decided on a relationship.

"Neither of us wanted to move in with a partner again," she explained, joking about defying the lesbian stereotype of bringing a moving truck to the second date.

"We love our independence," she told Mamamia.

"Yes, we miss each other, but it means we get to really focus on our kids, and our kids don't have to deal with huge adjustments, and we can keep different living standards or different attitudes to money without it being a big deal," she said.

"We are really deeply in love with each other and while I'm sure we could live together successfully if we wanted to, it just removes so much friction by allowing us to both have our own spaces."

The silver lining? "When we see each other after a week it's so joyful."

The assumption that LAT couples must be wealthy particularly irks her. "I don't think anyone normally thinks single mums are rich?" she jested.

"We just prioritise having our own 'nest' with the kids rather than aiming for a huge Brady Bunch situation."

The postcode dilemma.

Sometimes the choice comes down to lifestyle non-negotiables. Take *Amanda, who's been with her partner for two years. He has children from a previous marriage and she is child-free.

"I love living by myself and am in no rush to move in with my partner," she told Mamamia.

"Sometimes I think about it, and it sounds lovely for a second, but then I remember how much I'd be sacrificing — and for what?"

"He has kids, so he can't move out of the area as they go to school there. If we were to move in with each other I'd be moving one hour away from work," she explained.

"I'd definitely love it if we lived closer, but at this point, I am unwilling to move from where I am.

"I'd never have alone time plus be living with kids 50% of the time."

The previous property situation.

Then there's *Lin, who's mastered the art of geographical compatibility.

"I owned my property before we got together, and he wanted to buy his own," she explained to Mamamia.

"We are emotionally committed but financially separated, and I like it that way,"

"We just alternate spending weekends at each other's houses and don't have plans to cohabit any time soon."

The new relationship rules.

We're conditioned to believe that love follows a prescribed path: dating, exclusivity, cohabitation, marriage, kids, death. But LAT couples are writing their own rules.

For women especially, LAT relationships offer something previous generations rarely had: the ability to maintain their independence, financial autonomy, and personal space while still experiencing deep, committed love.

It's not about being afraid of commitment — it's about being smart enough to recognise that commitment comes in many forms.

The future of love.

As life becomes increasingly complex, LAT relationships might just be the practical solution we didn't know we needed.

They allow couples to navigate different life stages, parenting responsibilities, and financial situations without the pressure to merge everything.

Perhaps most importantly, they're giving us permission to love differently — to prioritise joy over convention, compatibility over cohabitation and personal happiness over societal expectations.

Because at the end of the day, if you can have deep, committed love AND not have to argue about who takes out the rubbish, why wouldn't you?

*Names have been changed for privacy.

Feature Image: Getty.