For as long as I can remember, my lips have resembled a dry, cracked riverbed. Which, let me tell you, hasn’t been particularly attractive or confidence boosting.
But no matter what I did, or used, nothing ever seemed to help.
For months before my wedding day, at the request of my makeup artist, I slathered my lips in vitamin facial oil morning and night (she even threatened to make me drink an entire bottle, but that's a story for a different day) to no avail.
I've drunk more water than was medically recommended after reading an article that said dry, cracked lips were most likely the result of dehydration.
"I am a dry, dry desert," I would tell myself, downing glass number 3874.
"I just need to be hydrated."
I've applied layers upon layers of different lip balms and moisturisers before bed in the hopes that I will wake up to lips that would make Angelina Jolie jealous. I've terrified delivery men after answering the door wearing sheet masks specifically designed to hydrate and moisturise my kisser.
I've scrubbed and exfoliated and even tried applying 71 lip balms at once because SURELY THAT WILL DO SOMETHING?!
LISTEN: Is it problematic to try lipstick on in store? Mamamia Out Loud's Jessie thinks yes... Post continues after audio.
Then, ten days ago, after a freak google search that may have included the words "DAMN IT FIX MY FACE", I discovered the product that would finally transform my lips from sandpaper to silk.