'I kept chasing happiness I couldn't find. Then I learned about life dysmorphia.'

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A major realisation hit me recently: I'm living exactly the life I've always wanted… and yet I constantly feel like I'm not doing enough.

I've packed up my life and moved across the country to make a home for myself in a big city. I work in women's media, living out my best 'main character from a rom-com who always seems to be a journalist' fantasy, the one that young Ailish always dreamed about. I've got incredible friends, my own apartment (it's still a rental, let's not get too excited here) and my little life is slowly coming together.

So, why, oh, why do I feel dissatisfied when, objectively, I'm thriving?

Then I came across the term 'life dysmorphia' — the disconnect between how life really is and how we feel it should be. Just as body dysmorphia distorts how we see ourselves in the mirror, life dysmorphia warps how we see our actual circumstances.

On paper, many of us in the West have better living standards than any generation before us — yet the rates of life satisfaction are dropping.

Earlier this year, the World Happiness Report — an annual barometer of wellbeing — found that Australia had dropped out of the top 10 global rankings of 'happiest' countries to 11th.

Watch: Hedonic adaptation: Why you'll never have enough in life.

We're told we're in the lucky country, but given the current backdrop of global economic, political and social instability, it's understandable why we might not feel it.

There's this impossible pressure to have it all. Chase the next promotion, travel the world, climb the career ladder, buy property, start a family — preferably all at once.

Meanwhile, we're balancing burnout, cost of living pressures, climate anxiety and a world that feels increasingly unstable.

But here's the thing, even if we solved all those external pressures, we might still be unsatisfied. There's something deeper going on.

In the words of comedian Jimmy Carr: "We're living like kings, and yet life has never been objectively better and subjectively worse."

I've created a life little me always dreamed of, yet I constantly feel like I'm not doing 'enough'. Image: Mamamia.

Many of us are caught on what's called the "hedonic treadmill" — no matter how great life gets, we adapt so quickly that it stops feeling extraordinary.

Think about a time when you got what you wanted — maybe you landed a new job, bought a new car or finally splurged on some shoes you'd been eyeing. Chances are, you were buzzing with happiness… But after a few weeks, that excitement lost its shine, and you settled back into how you felt before.

Our brains adjust so fast that this amazing life — where many of us are incredibly lucky by historical and global standards — becomes the 'new normal'.

It's also known as hedonic adaptation, psychologist Phoebe Rogers told Mamamia.

"The pleasure experienced in response to triggers, events, successes, wins and novelty is fleeting and short-lived. However, we are driven to keep seeking it," Phoebe said.

Hedonic adaptation is amplified by modern life — social media comparison, information overload and economic uncertainty all make it harder to appreciate what we have.

It reminded me of a recent conversation with a friend, both of us spiralling about our lives (just girly things). We were channelling our inner Sylvia Plath and her fig tree analogy, overwhelmed by all the paths we felt we should be taking — as if the lives we were actually building weren't enough.

But there was something I hadn't realised. She was admiring my Sydney hustle while I sat there thinking I wasn't doing enough.

It's wild how our own dissatisfaction can be completely invisible to everyone else.

No matter how great life gets, we adapt so quickly that it stops feeling extraordinary.

This isn't about pretending everything's perfect or dismissing real challenges. It's about understanding why our brains are wired to adapt so quickly that we stop noticing the good stuff.

So, how can we step off the hedonic treadmill, even briefly? According to Phoebe, we might be looking in the wrong places.

"The issue is that many happiness seekers focus on the wrong things to bring about happiness; they focus on life events such as relationships, marriage, a new job, a new house. However, we all carry a setpoint for happiness," Phoebe said.

Research from Sonja Lyubomirsky, author of The How of Happiness, suggests happiness is made of three factors: 50 per cent is determined by our genes (or 'set point', as Phoebe calls it), 10 per cent by life circumstances and 40 per cent by intentional activity.

"This is great, because we can take action," Phoebe said.

"Practice mindfulness and gratitude, avoid social comparison, exercise, cultivate self-compassion, pursue action guided by our values, engage in random acts of kindness; it's all about how you show up."

Gratitude journaling is one way to briefly step off the hedonic treadmill. Image: Pinterest/pinsforyoubabe.

Phoebe suggests focusing on meaning over happiness.

"Happiness is fleeting, temporary, a mood, rather than a permanent state of being," she said.

"If we were to consider other factors, such as creating meaning and purpose, we may feel more satisfied."

Meaning, Phoebe says, is more reliable.

"Then often happiness comes," she said. "We're human — constant happiness, joy, and pleasure aren't realistic and they aren't given; we can cultivate them."

Because sometimes the life we've been chasing is exactly the life we have — we just need to remember to notice it.

Feature image: Mamamia.