KATE LANGBROEK: 'I asked my son what I got right parenting him. This one response surprised me.'

When it comes to parenting, we're often our own harshest critics. In the quiet hours after bedtime, the questions linger like shadows in the hallway: Did I listen enough today? Was I too harsh, too lenient, too distracted?

These midnight calculations of our parenting balance sheets rarely tally in our favour. We remember the raised voice, the missed opportunity for connection, the screen time we allowed to stretch too long — while forgetting the thousand small acts of love that thread through our days.

For Kate Langbroek, host of Mamamia's No Filter, these questions have been whispered through 21 years of motherhood. But recently, in a rare moment of recognition that parents rarely get access to, she heard something we all long to know — that beneath the everyday chaos and doubt, something fundamental had taken root.

During a candid conversation on Mamamia's This Glorious Mess podcast, Kate and her 21-year-old son Lewis shared a glimpse into their relationship that illuminated what truly matters when raising children into adults you're proud to know.

When asked about his mum's biggest parenting "nail" — the triumph amidst the inevitable stumbles — Lewis's answer carried a weight that we didn't expect to hear.

Watch: Kate Langbroek's son Lewis on This Glorious Mess. Post continues below.

"Mum and dad really put a highlight on how important it is to be a good man," he shared.

"Especially growing up in school environments currently. There's a lot of talk about what we're doing wrong. But Mum, particularly, always taught us what it means to be a good adult man and the positive impact that you can have on the world. And all the good things you can do in the lives of everyone you know, or for the less fortunate. I think that was probably one of the biggest parenting wins that mum and dad have instilled in us."

For Kate, who has weathered the storms of raising three boys in a world increasingly complicated by conversations around masculinity, she replied, "Particularly as the mother of three sons, there's so much discussion about what is called toxic masculinity."

"And anyone who's got boys knows how beautiful they are. So I was always torn because, obviously, we know that there are societal issues, but I can't see that just bashing young boys or making them feel shameful works. It's a very alienating thing."

For Kate, the path forward wasn't about criticism but celebration, not about limitation but possibility.

"Why aren't we showing boys the positives of being a man? Why don't we have a series of ads about 'this is what a great boy and a great man does?'" she questioned.

"Men fighting bush fires, men building bridges, men changing a tyre by the side of the road for someone... Why aren't we showing the amazing and beautiful acts of strength and kindness that our boys and men have, and show them how to be a good man? Instead of saying, 'This is a bad man. Don't be a bad man'. It just doesn't work."

"I was always very aware of it in our family, not even in a teachable moment sort of way, just through the living of it," Kate explained, touching on how values are transmitted through family life.

"Because their father's a beautiful, honourable man, he's a living embodiment of what I wanted my boys to grow up to be and who I want my daughter to share the world with."

Lewis, carries these subtle lessons. "I know she's been a very, very wonderful mother and both my parents are really, and I'm very fortunate to have grown up in such a loving and safe household," he acknowledged.

Listen to the full episode with Kate and Lewis here. Post continues below.

Yet even in the moment of recognition, Kate holds fast to the humility that perhaps defines good parenting more than any perfect strategy or approach.

"I still say I don't know what I'm doing. I've never been a parent at this stage before," she admitted with characteristic honesty.

"There's a tendency for us to say, 'everyone's doing the best they can, everyone's not doing the best they can'. We know when we are, and there are many reasons why sometimes we don't, but the fact is, you can always change things. You can always change your dynamic."

Perhaps the greatest triumph isn't in getting everything right, but in creating a foundation strong enough that our children can recognise and name what matters most. For Lewis, it was the quiet, persistent message that being a man means something good and honourable.

And after getting to know him, I can safely say he is.

Feature Image: Instagram @katelangbroek