As a single woman who doesn’t much like bars (or staying up after 10pm come to think of it) I have occasionally used online dating sites to meet prospective partners.
Despite my mother’s fear that I shall be cut into little pieces and slowly devoured with an accompanying fine shiraz, I have actually found the vast majority of men I’ve met lovely. I’ve always assumed maybe my positive experiences have a lot to do with the fact that I have a finely tuned bullshit radar; hey – I used to be a High School teacher (lie detecting is a job necessity) and I have co-written an entire book on dating and relationships.
But then I met a Catfish.
The term “catfish” was popularised by the documentary film of the same name and the subsequent MTV reality show in which the hosts, Nev and Max, help those who suspect they may have been duped online track down who their online love buddies really are.
I started binge watching this show a few weekends ago – and yep (pardon the pun), I was hooked. Some of the people on the show had relationships lasting many years that they took very seriously – yet so often, sadly, found out it was all built on a lie. In many cases, the person they were really speaking to wasn’t even of the same gender as the persona they created.
Spurred on by watching these cyber investigations, I decided to do some research on a man I first met online about 6 months ago.
When we met, he had pursued me passionately – many texts, emails, roses, chocolates, dinners out… Big. Romance.