'On our 20th wedding anniversary, I discovered my husband's dating apps.'

My husband said he loved me and made plans for our future, but all along he was conspiring with his business partner to rob me.

I married young and met my ex-husband in my second year of university. We were both struggling students and started a life together, both working full-time with the promise of a bright future. 

Within three years of marriage, we welcomed two children. I moved to part-time work until they were school-age before going back to full-time.

Over the years, my husband and I moved interstate to chase work for him as he was constantly being retrenched. The children came, and I found work to support our family.

Finally, he found a business partner and was able to start a consultancy firm in a niche area.

For the first 10 years, I supported this venture.

He was often travelling for work within Australia, Asia and later Europe, and the business was struggling (or so I thought), so we took out an extra mortgage on our house.

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My husband was living a double life.

I found out that he was secretly hiding money. Most of the travel was with women he was dating on the apps. He was hiring prostitutes for a week at a time in Asian countries. I was funding this.

His business partner was doing the same thing. 

Due to the niche area of their business, they were making money, however, he would still tell me they were struggling and needed my input to keep supporting them.

I was essentially a single mother working full time and raising my children while he was off living a 5-star life (on me). 

I found this all out on our 20-year wedding anniversary. 

I discovered a secret account he had that showed he had been dating women for 13 years of our marriage.

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We got divorced in the middle of COVID. 

I called his business partner to ask for financial information about the business but was threatened that they would tie me up legally for years in the courts to not show financial information.

I lost my house and had no funds to support lawyers. 

They forced me to sign a binding financial agreement. 

The two business partners planned this to hide money from their wives and to live this lifestyle. They hired lawyers and accountants to show they were not making money. 

It was all hidden in secret trust funds.

My ex now lives on the waterfront, owns a yacht and frequently travels with his new partner.

He never sees his children.

This is a criminal and there is nothing I can do.

It's now four years later and I am grateful that my children have been able to move into early adulthood and establish their lives. It’s all I hoped for.

I am now an empty nester living alone. 

This is my story. Blindsided. Invisible.

The author of this story is known to Mamamia but has chosen to remain anonymous for privacy reasons.

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