'My mum and dad had 8 kids. Here's the most important lesson I learned growing up in a big family.'

I love being part of a big family. I'm kid number six, in a tribe of eight. I have two older sisters (the twins) and five brothers, one who sadly passed away. 

There's a 20-year gap between my twin sisters and my youngest brother, and the rest of us are somewhere in between. Even though being part of a big family is something I cherish, when I speak to people about my childhood I rarely mention that I'm one of eight.

Why? Because all my life I've had judgemental comments about my parents. People jump to conclusions and make assumptions about them. But I'm fiercely proud of my parents. My mum and dad were from different religions and backgrounds but they both loved children. So, our family continued to expand over 20 years.

Watch: Six television sisters we love watching. Post continues below.

Having so many kids wouldn't have been an easy gig for my parents. We all have different personalities and interests. And we don't always agree — which, if you ask me, is healthy. My big family shaped who I am today. They taught me the importance of sharing, being considerate and kind, and remembering that the world doesn't revolve around me.

I also learnt how to pick myself up when I fell over (literally or figuratively). Everyone was always so busy doing their own thing. I learnt to rely upon myself and to be independent from a young age.

Growing up in a big family has offered me continuous lessons in self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and resilience. There's been plenty of adventures (or misadventures), but my childhood wasn't like The Brady Bunch. In big families, there's no hiding.

Someone will always call you out.

But the biggest lesson I learnt was the importance of feedback. 

Someone will always call you out. And while the feedback isn't always gentle, it is always honest. In time, I learnt to listen without crumbling, reflect without defensiveness, and (eventually) thank my siblings for helping me grow.

These lessons have come in handy during my career, especially when providing advice to CEOs and executives of large, complex organisations. They've made me an expert listener and someone who is open to other opinions.

When I was little, I had a bad temper and lots of opinions. This didn't always make for 'sensible' conversations. Thankfully, my older sisters and brothers were big on 'feedback'. They would tell me when I was being inappropriate, rude, or acting up.

I didn't always appreciate it. But now looking back, I realise they helped me build my communication skills and emotional intelligence.

My first birthday party, where there wasn't just my immediate family on the guest-list, was a big lesson. I was eight and so high on sugar that I didn't care that I had guests at the party to celebrate. All I wanted to do was stay in my bedroom and unwrap all the extra presents I'd been given. I couldn't contain my excitement at having multiple presents to open. 

But, much to the relief of my parents, my older siblings coaxed me out of my bedroom. They couldn't start the party games without me. Plus, they didn't want to be left entertaining 10 kids.

They explained that my friends were there to celebrate with me. If I came out my bedroom, I could play, then open my presents later. This feedback showed me that life didn't revolve around me — even if it was my birthday. 

My big family would continue to provide me with feedback throughout my childhood.

Feedback was a good lesson.

Christmas always held some special treasures. With nine people to buy for, Christmas was always a bit of a stretch for my budget. As a 12-year-old, I remember the $20 my dad gave me to buy gifts didn't go far. 

So, being a creative and resourceful kid, I had to think outside the box. The result? I 'borrowed' my older brother's anti-dandruff shampoo and conditioner, wrapped it up nicely, and gave it back to him as his Christmas gift.

The look of surprise, then anger on my brother's face would've been priceless had his anger not been directed at me. Thankfully, my dad quickly stepped in to calm the situation down. He encouraged my brother to let it go and move on. 

The feedback was a good lesson. Aside from teaching me it's not cool to steal your brother's shampoo, I also learnt that forgiveness is important. Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to accept what happened as being okay, but it's important to help us move on.

I also learnt from the feedback my older siblings received. When I was in primary school, our house was located next to a church. During school holidays, my older brothers often played cricket in the church car park.

As you can imagine, this didn't go down well. I'm not sure how many windows were broken. My parents refused to make excuses for us kids. They were big on us taking responsibility for our actions.

This meant that my brothers had to take it in turn to apologise and ask for their ball back. Mum and dad probably negotiated payment behind the scenes.

The feedback is priceless.

I wouldn't change a thing. I love my big family. Being one of eight kids has brought me challenges, but also plenty of opportunities for growth. The 'feedback' I've received has been priceless. My family has helped me be a less embarrassing adult.

But like everyone, I still make mistakes. However, I remember that none of us are perfect –we're all a work in progress. Without a doubt, the biggest and most important lesson I learnt from growing up in a big family is the importance of feedback. 

My advice? Try to listen with an open mind and heart to the feedback you receive from the people you regularly interact with. This includes your family, friends, and work colleagues. There will always be wisdom in the feedback they offer – even if you don't like it. And there is always room for self-improvement.

Bronwyn Frazer is the author of What if...? How to reframe challenges into opportunities for growth. Available now at all good retailers.

Feature Image: Supplied.