real life

Fiona Falkiner was in Peru when she first fell in love with a woman. Then she was 'outed' by paparazzi.

Fiona Falkiner never imagined she would marry a woman. 

The model, TV presenter and mum-of-two recently wed Hayley Willis, co-host of Mamamia's Here If You Need podcast

For Fiona, she had never imagined this is what her life would look like. But after a life-changing experience in Peru, Fiona had a realisation about her sexuality. 

Watch: Glennon Doyle Untamed on her marriage, sexuality and choosing an authentic life. Story continues below.


Video via YouTube.

Fiona knows what it's like to be hounded by paparazzi - just take the time she was photographed without her consent on a remote beach, where she was sunbathing topless. Those photos were then published without her consent. 

"It took me days to recover. I was in bed for days crying," Fiona recalled on No Filter.

But this wasn't her first traumatic encounter with paparazzi.

In 2017, Fiona went off on a six-week holiday across South America with her friends, many of whom are gay. Fiona started getting "butterflies" with one of the women.

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At this point in time, Fiona was no stranger to the public eye. 

When she was 23, she was on the reality TV show The Biggest Loser. Following that, Fiona would regularly be stalked by paparazzi. So a trip away felt like the best mini-escape option. And getting to know this lesbian friend was equally exciting. 

"We got drunk, hooked up, we shared a tent, things happened. But it was when I was in the media, being papped and followed a lot. I had this amazing connection with her, and it was a really big decision in my life. Because if I want to continue this and bring it back to Australia, it's going to come out. It won't be in my control," Fiona reflected on Mamamia's podcast HER with Sophie Cachia.

"I knew it was going to be taken away from me."

While climbing Machu Picchu in Peru, Fiona sat down and considered her options. 

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Prior to this moment, Fiona had never fully realised her sexuality. She had experienced "girl crushes" in her early years, but it hadn't yet clicked.

She had also grown up in a small, country town in Victoria, unaware of anyone in her community who was gay. As for relationships prior to Peru, Fiona said she had "hooked up" with a few guys, but "no one that really took my breath away".

Fiona knew that when she came back to Australia, she would be photographed going on dates. And if that date was to be with a woman, Fiona felt like that would become even greater paparazzi tabloid fodder.

"That's a big deal to not be sure what your feelings are and have it taken - to not be your choice," she said.

But the connection was too strong to let it go. So Fiona and her new girlfriend began dating when they returned from South America to Australia. 

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"It came down to knowing how unhappy I was for such a long time. Being in this space where I'm like 'yes this isn't what I imagined for myself, but I'm actually truly happy'."

She told her family, who were all "super excited" and responded well.

But then Fiona was 'outed' by the paparazzi, without her consent. 

"We were inseparable for four months. Then we got papped. We were coming out of a shop holding hands and we kissed," she said. 

"I used to care so much what everyone thought. People would write things about me, and I'd get so upset. My sexuality was a big push for me to stop caring what other people think."

In 2018, Fiona met Hayley Willis. And ever since, they've been one another's rock.

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"She is my person," Fiona said to Sophie Cachia. "I think I said 'love you' to Hayley nine days after meeting her. Being able to be so open, honest and raw with a woman [is special]. I have my people, I have my love, I have my animals and my bubbies, and I'm bloody happy. All the exterior noise, I just block it out."

And when it comes to labels, Fiona said they're not for her - simply, "I love who I love."

"I guess being put into a box makes me uncomfortable. I'm in a really, really happy place. I would give that 20-year-old version of myself a hug and tell her everything's going to be okay. You will find yourself, you will find your penguin."

Listen to more of Fiona's story in HER with Sophie Cachia.

Feature Image: Instagram @fionafalkiner.

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