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The five types of Mummy Facebook posts.

The rise of gigantic mothers groups on Facebook has opened incredible doors, enabling the sisterhood to stay connected like never before.

From hairdresser recommendations to tips for toilet training, if you need to know anything at all you can just ask your local mummy network. You’ll get the answer you want and about a hundred more from women who can’t deny their biological urge to be helpful.

"You’ll get the answer you want and about a hundred more from women who can’t deny their biological urge to be helpful." Image via iStock.

I have a love/hate relationship with my local mums’ Facebook group. At best, it’s informative and fun. At worst, it’s bitchy and even shocking.

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Read more: What your Facebook status really says about you.

These are the types of posts on parenting boards that most of us struggle to get our heads around:

1. The thinly veiled bragger.

“OMG so tired. I just fed my son food from a sachet! Please tell me I’m not a bad mum!”

What you’re really telling us is that you make all your kid’s meals from scratch. Probably using organic ingredients. And that your kid actually eats kale chips on a regular basis rather than smashing them into his hair.

The rest of us are rolling our eyes. Vegetables from a packet still count as vegetables in our houses.

2. The nosey parker.

You see these posts a lot. Ones that say, “Police sirens on Smith Street! Does anybody know what’s going on?”.

Do you really need to know that someone has had a terrible accident? The purpose of local parenting forums isn’t really to encourage your nosiness.

Read more: “Why I quit Facebook after my split.”

3. The debate inciter.

Please, please, please don’t post a link to an article from some random website about vaccination and try to tell a massively diverse group of women that this is proof that big pharma is out to get us. You’re never going to get a consensus of opinion. You’re far more likely to get insulted by someone who is as equally righteous in the other direction.

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And don’t try posting something controversial and saying “No judgement please!”. Forum mothers are more judgy than the chocolate sponge panel at the Country Women’s Association.

"Don’t try posting something controversial and saying 'No judgement please!'" Image via iStock.

4. The T.M.I. Mum.

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There’s sharing, and then there’s oversharing.

Your entire parenting group does not need to know about your issues in the marital bed. Some things are best kept between close girlfriends over a glass of bubbly or three. Please leave the rest of us out of it!

Read more: It’s a victory for mums over Facebook. We can now do this.

5. The “Help! My husband hit me” mother.

Posts one through four are annoying, but reasonably harmless. This final type of mother is the one who I find completely devastating. The frustrating thing about these posts is the fact that you see them so often.

My local parenting Facebook group has over 7,000 members. I live in a nice area that is considered to be highly affluent. I see posts about verbal and physical abuse on almost a weekly basis. Women usually post anonymously, too scared to be open about their own identity.

"This final type of mother is the one who I find completely devastating." Image via iStock.
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Posts like this are a stark reminder that domestic violence is happening all around us, no matter where we live. These are the women I see at the park and the shops. I don’t even know if some of them are my own friends.

The positive that comes from this, is the avalanche of comments saying, “I was you. I got out and I’m okay.”

Read more: “Everyone thought my life, and marriage, was perfect. Until he drugged me.”

Women are ready and waiting to help, sharing info about local refuges even offering to drive over in the middle of the night to pick up a total stranger and her children.

While all of us mums wish these cries for help didn’t have to exist, thank heaven for the sisterhood. Modern technology provides a huge reminder that when it comes to domestic violence you don’t have to feel alone.

If you need information regarding domestic violence, contact 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732).

Do you have any to add to the list?

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