'My friend wants me to pay $250 for her hen's lunch. I want to refuse.'

Would you pay $250 for a friend's hen's lunch?

Or… risk losing a friendship if you said no?

When a Mamamia Family community member posted about their hen's party conundrum, it struck a nerve.

"A pretty good friend of mine is having a hen's party — it's a $250 per person lunch," Sarah* shared in our Facebook Group.

The cost wasn't for an elaborate experience — it was for lunch and three drinks. That's it.

Watch: Annaliese and Tegan discuss the hen's lunch on This Glorious Mess. Post continues below.

"It's going to be a struggle to afford that in our budget, especially when I also have the wedding a few weeks later (factoring in an expensive gift, accommodation and babysitters)," she explained.

But Sarah's dilemma went beyond just the eye-watering price tag.

"She's the type of person who is going to be upset and angry if I don't go, and it will likely damage our friendship." she added.

To hen or not to hen?

Her question to the group was simple: "Should I suck it up and make cuts to pay for the $250 lunch? Or do I think of myself and family and apologise and potentially lose a friend?"

She added, "Is $250 normal for lunch these days?"

While this might seem like a huge amount to pay for some, the stats tell us Sarah isn't alone.

According to Wedded Wonderland, Australians are spending an average of $614 just on hen's parties these days. Yes, you read that right — $614.

Welcome to 2025, where wedding celebrations have morphed into a marathon of Instagram-worthy events, each with its own hefty price tag. From engagement parties to kitchen teas, hen's events to recovery brunches — the list (and costs) keep growing.

Listen to the hen's lunch dilemma on This Glorious Mess. Post continues below.

The Mamamia Family group had thoughts. Strong ones.

"They should have organised something less extravagant or at least paid for part of it if that was the hen's they wanted. It would want to be pretty good food for $250!" one of the community members commented on Sarah's post.

Another added: "I have been married and been to a lot of hen's parties. That's crazy. But each to their own. But there's no way I would be upset about someone not coming. Obviously, there will be people who can't afford this. Surely, by booking this, you would have to acknowledge this."

And then there were those who were more direct: "I can't believe the entitlement of some people when it comes to their wedding and all the events leading up to it. That is an unbelievable request."

Of course, not everyone felt this way. Another commenter offered a different perspective: "I don't think $250 is crazy expensive these days for a nice venue ($150 for a set menu and extra for probably very nice wine), BUT I would never dream of choosing a venue and asking people to pay that, so she hasn't really considered the guests."

But it wasn't just the cost people were calling into question. "Can't help feeling that if you lost a friend over the fact that you can't afford it, she's not that good a friend to begin with," one person weighed in.

Another member agreed: "That is a ridiculous expectation and a 'friend' you can do without. Who in their right mind gets angry at a friend for not being able to afford something?"

As the cost-of-living crisis continues to bite, these wedding-adjacent celebrations are becoming a flashpoint for broader conversations about money, friendship and social expectations.

Maybe it's time we normalised having honest conversations about money with our friends. Because while your big 'special day' might be priceless, your friends' financial wellbeing shouldn't be the price of admission.

And coming from the perspective of a divorcee with hindsight on her side, none of the fanfare really matters at the end of the day. Certainly not worth losing a friend over skipping an overpriced lunch.

*Names changed for privacy.

Have you experienced similar pressure around wedding celebrations? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

Feature Image: Canva.