'In no way did I need 7 handbags.' My biggest mistakes when packing for a Euro summer.

After a three-and-a-half week summer holiday in Europe, I am officially home but my luggage is not and I can’t even pretend to be mad.

Because after almost four weeks of dragging that 22.3kg suitcase around the cobbled streets of Europe and forcing friends to rearrange their car interiors, including placement of children, to accommodate my completely over-the-top baggage, I never wanted to see that bag again.

I just... didn’t think that wish would come true.

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And now as I sit here contemplating exactly what is inside that case (suspected to still be sitting somewhere in the giant monstrosity that is Beijing International Airport), I can’t help but think WhY dId I pAcK sO mUcH?!

Why the actual f**k did I think I needed seven handbags, eight pairs of shoes and precisely a bajillion outfits? Because I sure as hell didn’t wear them all.

So here are my lessons, friends. May you heed them wisely because I can tell you this now, come Euro summer 2024, you can bet I will have forgotten them all.

1. You don’t need heels in ye olde towns.

Having already pictured the pain of hauling luggage across uneven streets of ancient times, now just imagine doing that in stilettos. 

So while I thought I was actually being PRACTICAL holidaying with a pair eahc of white, black AND tan heels, they were, in actual fact, a GIANT waste of space in my case because the number of times I wore them while stumbling along the roads of Italy or Albania was exactly ZERO. 

That one time I did wear heels for a friend's wedding in England.

2. Seven handbags is too many.

I blame the shoes, because white, black and tan heels meant I needed coordinating bags, obviously, even if it meant doubling up on casual shoulder bags, dressier clutches and big totes.

Which was silly, because not only did I not need the shoes but half the time I went out WITHOUT A BAG and just chucked a lip gloss into my friend’s. Because that’s the thing about Europe. You throw on a dress for dinner and just stroll out of your hotel without a care in the world and no possessions to weigh you down.

3. You will not use your $200 face products.

When I say I recently spent $200 on just TWO products for my skin, I cannot reiterate how much of a big deal that is for this modest girlie who thrives on affordable beauty. So these ridiculously expensive buys were a BIG DEAL.

So big, I thought, 'I MUST TAKE THEM TO EUROPE AND USE THEM EVERY DAY.' But no.

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The retinol makes my pillow yellow and I couldn’t possibly do that to my friend’s spare beds or hotel rooms, and who even has time to remember to put on vitamin A oil when you’re rushing off to the beach to absorb all that natural vitamin D?

And now all I can think about is how those $200 products instead sat inside my toiletries bag inside the hire car in heatwave-degrees, no doubt destroying all their fancy expensive ingredients. Love that for me.

4. Always pack jeans and a jumper.

For someone who lived in London for six years, I should well and truly know by now that just because it’s ‘summer’, that doesn’t mean that the sun will shine or that it will even be warm in the UK.

So when I ended up on the west coast of Wales in the pouring rain, jeans and a jumper would have been a great call. As would've a brolly. 

5. You don’t need all those lipsticks.

For a gal who has not one but two pots of Vaseline in her handbag at all times, what the heck was I thinking bringing multiple shades of pink and nude lipsticks on holiday with me? MULTIPLE!

The commitment to a lip is something I can barely handle at the best of times, let alone while I am at my most relaxed self. Note to future me: just pick one. 

One of the many nights I went out without a bag. Image: Supplied.

6. There is such a thing as too many ‘going out’ dresses.

I know, I know – you want to look your fiercest on hols, but in reality, you won’t always have time to pop back to the hotel for an outfit change. And some nights you might just grab a pizza and eat it on the beach while watching a Sicilian sunset, you know?

So soon enough you realise that you aren’t working your way through your pile of ‘going out’ clothes and a few summer dresses to throw over a bikini would have been far more logical.

7. Probs don’t need 10 g-strings.

If you think G-strings are too uncomfortable to wear, your opinion will not change on holiday. I learned this the hard way.

Feature image: Supplied.