Em Rata thinks the world wants her to be relatable. She couldn't be more wrong.

Emily Ratajkowski has spent a lot of her time in the spotlight being really open about her life.

Through her Instagram, her TikTok, her book and her podcast, she's always been the kind of celebrity who speaks about her life candidly, in her own words (as opposed to say, through publicists). 

We know how she feels about her divorce. 

In September, she went viral with a TikTok saying she thought it was "chic" to be divorced in your 30s.

"So it seems that a lot of ladies are getting divorced before they turn 30," she said in the viral video. "And as someone who got married at 26, has been separated for a little over a year [and is] 32, I have to tell you I don't think there's anything better."

We know her feelings towards her body through her own words (many of which were bound together in a book of essays, aptly titled My Body), and how she felt when men, like the one she said published nude images of her without her concent, thought it was for them.

Ratajkowski also knows she cannot hide away from the fact that she fulfils all the near-impossible beauty standards society places on women, has grown a following based on her fulfilment of those standards and has become wealthy and successful because of it.

"The truth is that the reason that I was even able to publish my book and write about the things that I did was because I have 30 million followers from basically sexualising myself," she explained in a new interview with Vogue Australia. 

"So it is important to realise that there is a level that you can gain as a woman by playing that game and hustling the system."

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No one on this earth, not even Ratajkowski herself, would argue with the fact that the way she moves through life gives her privilege, which may why she has cultivated such a strong part of her brand to be based on wading into wider cultural conversations.

For example, on her podcast, High Low with EmRata, (which was cancelled in October) she would occasionally interview guests. But most of the time, the episodes featured Ratajkowski musing about topics ranging from self-doubt and attachment styles to interior design. 

It was not necessarily groundbreaking, but it was interesting to hear her ponder topics and how they pertained to our culture. Even if you raise an eyebrow or consider them hollow because of the messenger, Ratajkowski's opinions have usually fallen on the 'right' side of feminism, thus building her a much wider-ranging audience than she would otherwise have.

But in widening her appeal this way, she has also fallen into a common celebrity 'vulnerability trap'.

Where they're constantly sharing their hardships as a way to appear relatable.

Of course, celebs can have hardships. Everyone can have hardships, and everyone's are relative and also valid. But to many people, the life of Ratajkowski – and practically every other very rich, very famous person  –  is not relatable and that's just the reality of being very rich and very famous.

While Ratajkowski's monologues about feminism or championing of divorced women meet some criticism, it's nothing like the furore that happens when she swings too far in the direction of 'see, I'm like you'.

The most recent example comes near the end of her December 2023 Vogue Australia profile, in which she shared an anxiety about being a single parent.

"I have moments where I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm like, 'I can't believe I'm 32 and I'm a single-income household with a child who I'm fully responsible for,'" she said.

She's not wrong. That is her situation following her divorce from ex Sebastian Bear-McClard.

But though it speaks to an experience plenty of other parents can probably relate to, it falls flat because the truth is, her single-income household is not the same as most other people's single-income households.

Ratajkowski's audience watch her TikToks and listen to her podcasts and it's clear they expect two things: pondering, about feminist theory or a philosophical question, and the kind of magic escapism you can only get from someone that lives a life vastly different to your own.

They're not there for relatability, and it shows in the feedback.

Feature image: Getty.

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