"Sledging is part of sport. If you can't handle it, go home".

In case you are not aware, we are currently in the midst of the Ashes and it would seem the trash talking being done by the players is dominating post-match conversations as much as the actual cricket.

During play on day four, a stump microphone picked up Australian Captain Michael Clarke telling English player James Anderson to “get ready for a fucking broken arm” as he prepared to face Mitchell Johnson.

The night before, during a press conference, Aussie player David Warner had also had a crack at the English side, saying that he felt their players were batting with “scared eyes”.

I’m not sure how David ascertained this and what constitutes “scared eyes” but he seemed quite happy with the sledge.

It did its job, with English Captain Alastair Cooke saying Warner was “disrespectful” for publicly passing judgement on the state of the English team’s eyeballs.

Since we insist on placing a mic on every single available surface on the sporting arena, we are now privy to the conversations that happen between professional sportspeople in the heat of battle.

Australia are considered the heavyweight world champions when it comes to sledging; it is part of our culture. It happens at the lowest levels of sport right up to the Ashes, and I, for one, am a huge fan of it. I think sledging is an essential part of sport and if you can’t handle it, then you are a big sissy boy who should go home and cry to your Mummy about your hurt feelings, sooky-lala-pooey-pants.

Sorry.

I am pretty sure Clarkey didn’t mean Mitchell Johnson was literally going to break James Anderson’s arm. I think he was simply commenting on the speed at which Mitchell was bowling, in a creative fashion.

Some people are now saying that we should wipe sledging out all together. That is has no place in the game of cricket; in any game.

I say those people are dickheads. I bet they are the same lot who dob on people in the supermarket for removing the stalks off the truss tomatoes so they weigh less.

Also, won’t someone think of the umpires! How boring would it be for them if the players were gagged and sledging stopped?

There is nothing polite about elite sport. Sledging is used to distract an opponent from their game and is an integral part of a wining attack strategy.

Plus it is bloody hilarious when done right.

Here are some of my favourite “sledges of history “:

Shane Warne & Daryll Cullinan

Shane always had the upper hand over Daryll and when he walked out to face Warnie after not having played him in some time, Warnie yelled out: “I’ve been waiting two years for another chance at you.” To which Daryll replied, “Looks like you spent it eating.”

OH NO HE DIDN’T!

Mark Waugh & James Ormond

England’s James Ormond came out to bat in a match with Australia. Mark Waugh spat at him: “What are you doing out here? You’re too shit to play for England!” To which James retorted: “Maybe so, but at least I’m the best player in my family.” (Mark’s brother Steve was Aussie Captain at the time.)

OH SNAP!

Merv Hughes & Viv Richards.

During a test match in Jamaica, Merv would stare at Viv after each bowl. It was pretty creepy. Viv had finally had enough and said: “Don’t you be staring at me, man. This is my island, my culture. And in my culture we just bowl.” Hughes replied: “In my culture we just say fuck off”.

BOOM!

As with all things of this nature, a balance must be found. I feel anything of an intensely personal nature should be avoided (comments about player’s mothers are a no go), flat out verbal abuse is no fun and any form of racism is absolutely unacceptable – everything else is open slather. Good humoured on-field banter is part of the rich tapestry of our nations proud sporting history.

Now go forth, you magnificent competitors and comment on your opponent’s comb-over/bad breath/poor skills etc with my full support.

UPDATE: Michael Clarke has been charged by the ICC and is expected to be charged 20 per cent of his match fee.

What do you think about sledging? Does it have its place in sport?