DV survivor Jessica Silva stabbed her partner to death to save her own life.

In a candid interview with 60 Minutes, Jessica Silva discusses the day she had to kill her violent partner to protect her family.

Trigger warning: This post contains details of domestic violence that could be distressing for some readers.

On Mother’s Day 2012, Jessica Silva stabbed James Polkinghorne – her partner, and father of her young son – to death.

She was charged with murder, and spent eight months in a maximum security prison awaiting trial.

And last month, she walked free from court.

On tonight’s 60 Minutes, Jessica told the story of how her relationship with Polkinghorne began – and then how it descended into a nightmare of mental and physical abuse.

Speaking candidly to host Michael Usher, Jessica revealed the warning signs of violence to come.

“He always had to be right. Everything had to be done his way and in his time.”

She recounts the first time she was physically assaulted, describing how Polkinghorne grabbed her by the neck, pushed her against the wall, and choked her.

“And then he let me go, and then he just ran down the side of the road and just started head-butting the cars down the side of the road.”

Neighbours called the police following the incident, who arrived and questioned Jessica.

“The police came and the police, um, asked me why I had red marks around my neck. And I just said that it was an allergic reaction, because he had told me that if I had said anything to the police, that here’d be a lot of drama.”

She describe a relationship characterised by hideous abuse, both mental and physical: her partner belittling her, calling her fat, ugly and worthless, throwing her across the room and holding her over the balcony. He pinned her down, and punched and kicked her.

It’s only April. And 19 women have already lost their lives to domestic violence this year.

Yet Jessica still held out hope the relationship could be salvaged – and she was counting on the birth of their son to turn things around. The plan backfired, with Polkinghorne – who had always been a body builder – beginning to abuse steroids and and the drug ice.

Whenever Jessica considered leaving, Polkinghorne was quick to scare her into submission. Referring to a drug murder in which police suspect he was involved, he would threaten: “Jessica, do you know who I am? I’m an effing murderer.”

Finally, it all became too much, and Jessica took her son and moved back into her family home.

Two days before Mother’s Day, she received a phone call from an enraged Polkinghorne.

“I’ll kill youse all. I’m telling you, I’m not effing joking.”

Jessica describes the way he sounded on the phone as “crazy”.

“I couldn’t even understand him”.

In a move that would go on to have ramifications for her court case, Jessica contacted her brother, asking, “Is there anyone we can contact, somebody, to get him killed or something?”

It was this statement that suggested to police that Polkinghorne’s death may have been premeditated murder – and led to her being held in custody for the 18 months prior to the trial.

Jessica told 60 Minutes she did not mean what she said: “I was just scared. I don’t know why I said that.”

 “Domestic violence occurs in every class, culture and community.”

Two days later, on the 13th of May, Polkinghorne arrived at the Silva family home. He stood on the street shouting threats about killing Jessica and her family. His rage was volcanic.

When Jessica walked outside in an attempt to calm him down, Polkinghorne attacked her.

“He just started punching my face, trying to pull me down to the ground.”

Jessica’s brother, anxious to protect his sister, quickly stepped in to help – but against a body-builder’s physique and a mind addled by drug use, he barely stood a chance.

It was then, seeing her former partner choking her brother on the bitumen outside her childhood home, that Jessica realised she needed to act.

“I was just screaming, “He’s gonna kill my brother! He’s gonna kill my brother!” So I went and got a knife. Just to kind of scare him. I wasn’t thinking I was going to use it.”

“He looked up and he went to grab me again and to drag me back down to the ground, and he was punching my back at the same time, trying to drag me. And that’s when I stabbed him.”

There’s only one thing Jessica knows with certainty about that day: If she hadn’t stabbed him, she’d be dead.

When the police arrived on the scene, Jessica says she believed she was going to jail for ‘a very long time’. And she wasn’t far from wrong: she spent eight months in Silverwater Maximum Security Prison awaiting trial, leaving her son in the care of her parents.

In a heartbreaking revelation, Jessica’s father, Avalino Silva, described how for the first six months of Jessica’s incarceration, her son would wake up at night, screaming ‘Dad, don’t hit Mummy!’

She was the victim of unthinkable domestic violence. But when she pulled out a gun, she was the one charged.

In a trial that lasted three weeks and made headlines all over Australia, Jessica was eventually found guilty of the lesser charge of manslaughter by excessive self-defence. But the real shock came at sentencing only a few weeks ago, when a judge handed down a wholly suspended sentence.

As long as Jessica does not violate her good behaviour bond, she will not serve any jail time.

“Coming home to my son, that was… that’s… a feeling I can’t describe. I was just so relieved I was coming home to my son.”

Jessica insists that she will one day tell her son the whole story of what unfolded between his parents.

“It’s hard, but I’m going to tell my son the truth. It is going to be very hard, but he deserves the truth.”

As for Jessica herself, it’s unlikely the events of that fateful day will ever truly leave her.

“I don’t know how to feel. I don’t know what to feel. It’s just my head’s… everything’s still in there.

“Like, it’s just like my head is so heavy, so heavy, of just holding everything in there. I just want it out, but… I just want it to escape, but it won’t.”

Despite their recent success, Jessica’s legal team is now gearing up for another fight: this time, to overturn the manslaughter sentence so that her criminal record is clear.

Whether or not the appeal s successful, it seems there might be a chance at a happy ending for Jessica and her son after all.

If this post brings up any issues for you, or if you just feel like you need to speak to someone, please call 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) – the national sexual assault, domestic and family violence counselling service. It doesn’t matter where you live, they will take your call and, if need be, refer you to a service closer to home.